aNgelBeaR

2008-12-11T08:17:00.000-08:00

i just wish i could just sing all day long from now on ..
singing just help me relieve everything im sick and tired about
but though yeah it makes me emo too =/
and godamit pls don make a fool out of me again !
just let it happen the way i want it to be .. and just FUCK OFF !

and oh yeah ppl i think im switching over to livejournal soon ..
cause i wanna keep my posts more privately HAHA ! (since this blog is quite dead too)
so yeah those who are closer to me, add me on livejournal then =))
till den bye !

2008-12-11T08:07:00.000-08:00

im still freaking loving this song from chris daughtry !

Over You ( CHRIS DAUGHTRY )

Now that it's all said and done,
I can't believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down,
Like an old abandoned house.
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath.
I fell too far, was in way too deep.
Guess I let you get the best of me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

You took a hammer to these walls,
Dragged the memories down the hall,
Packed your bags and walked away.
There was nothing I could say.
And when you slammed the front door shut,
A lot of others opened up,
So did my eyes so I could see
That you never were the best for me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

2008-12-07T19:37:00.000-08:00

the 42.195km run was a god damit KILLER !
its the first time that the accumalated lethic on my thighs, calf , whole freaking leg was so overwhelming =/
and yeah it could just be my first and last 42km marathon HAHA !
(all thanks to me nt training well for this run and just went for it lol)
but im so glad i did it ! and cheers to those who did it too =))

and dunno why this thought suddenly dawn upon me ..
luck do play an important role in whatever phase of life we are in ..
for me now, my luck is seriously DOWN DOWN and DOWN ! =/
never seem to do anything well .. hate all the screwing up parts it SUCKS !
but oh well what can i do when luck isnt on my side ..
everything just sucks !
but im really glad for all the friends that are here with me =))
many small little things seem to just come and go but im nt sharing it here HAHA !
hope all of you are not as suay as me cause it never goona be a good feeling =((
take care all !

2008-12-04T05:26:00.001-08:00

MY LIFE SEEM SCREWED ! CAUSE I DON EVEN KNOW WHAT I WANT =/
shant keep thinking but my stupid brain just forbid me ! GRRR !
gotta get back on track and not waste any of the precious time before ns =((

yeah and on a side note, i dunno why im suddenly so in to the song OVER YOU by chris daughtry .. never much bout the lyrics though but its just simply a dam nice song ! it kinda soothe my heart whenever i listen to it lol !

AND YEAH ! POST PROM WAS OBVIOUSLY SPLENDID ! (sadly, all photos are not with me yet)
and to think again its crazy that standard chartered marathon is this sun .. and im running 42.195km without any runs in these few days ! i just hope it wont be a shitty day for me =/
so cya ppl and i think its time for me to start finding a job and not let mine stupid imaginations running wild HAHA !

2008-11-29T18:49:00.000-08:00

FUN ! FUN ! FUN !
it had been lots of fun since the last paper =)))
drink,sing,play,eat wohoo !
and proms coming real soon ,, looking quite forward to that for dunno wat reason lol
AND YEAH PPL , ny post prom at butter factory 3rd dec
so i shall see some of you there too haha ..
i shall have fun till prom and its time for me to go work cause my money is like shrinking like fuck
so yeah if anyone gt job lobang feel free to tell me =))
tats all and cya all real soon while i finally take a 1day rest for today !
take care all ..

2008-11-07T21:45:00.001-08:00

STRESS ! STRESS ! STRESS !
seriously hate myself to keep thinking bout the papers though its over ! ARGH SUCK !
but thinking bout the fun i'll have after next week makes me DAM DAM HAPPY !
yeah ppl , thanks for those who wish me good luck and i'll definitely be free for you guys after next week ! WOHOO !
but quite suck leh , seem like poly peeps having exam when its over for me ? LOL ! (i bet you all sure dam slack too so its ok la =)) HAHA )
till den TAKE CARE ALL !

im weak
will you be the one to build me up or tear me down ?

2008-11-07T05:55:00.000-08:00

around a 6o for paper 1 and a 80 for paper 2 = overall around 70 ?
but will i still be able to get a good grade ..
i'll be glad to just settle for a B for math =))
as for geo, gotta keep my momentum and hopefully for a good grade ..
for econs next week pls dont come out anything funny !
ACTUALLY , its an overall sucky a lvls till now .. i still simply cant get all the correct ans in my script and fail to avoid all the careless mistakes ..
but oh well like what many say ; what done is done ..
maybe i just suck at major exams , YEAH BIG TIME !
good luck to the rest for the remaining a lvls and don get bad luck like mine =x

2008-11-04T03:53:00.000-08:00

HOLY SHIT ! I THINK I FUCKING SCREW-ED ALL MY PAPER TILL NOW !!
WHY MUST A LVL COME OUT SO MUCH HARDER WHEN ITS MY YEAR ?!!
OR MAYBE ITS JUST THAT I SUCK !
FCUK THE WORLD AND FCUK MYSELF !
maybe its still a fucking wrong reason for me to come into a JC ..
really dam dam wrong !
i dont even know how the hell are i going to continue complete the rest of the papers ,
this SUCK , truly SUCK !

girl, i wish that you are by my side now . .

2008-10-30T05:13:00.000-07:00

GOOD LUCK TO EVERYONE FOR ALVLS !

yeah ppl finally its here ! for ppl taking hist tmr all the best ! x)) and for others on mon den haha
and yep if you gt meet up with me for the past few days, you will know how suay i have been ..
but nvm ; and yeah i have help some of you guys pray for good results too =)))
so i just wish everyone hardwork to be paid off and as for me, i just hope i still can cope with the paper and its good enough x)))

and yep my enlistment date is on 14 april and i still have dam lots of time to play after a lvls ! WOHOO ! so yeah 3 more weeks to go ! till den , take care all !

2008-10-18T22:05:00.000-07:00

yeah man i do believe that miracles do exist ..
just like how GUNNERS and LPOOL got back from the losing end at ht but won it in the end =)) HAHA
i'll hold faith in my heart ..
waiting for the unexpected to happen X))

2008-10-17T23:56:00.000-07:00

i never even guess i will miss you so =/ ..

trying to work it out myself for a long time, but just cant seem to come to an conclusion ..
or am i really being haunted by karma ? pls don ZZ
but yeah i regretted doing all the wrongs in the past ; and yeah the feelings seriously suck !
hopefully its just not too late yet =/
RESOLUTION FOR THE FUTURE :
i goona try to give my best for everything ! ,
since now that everything has change, i can only just hope for the best ! =))
and jus sincerely hope that watever im doing now would just turn out fine and right ..
really have to regain the confidence which i have totally lost =/

oh ya ppl, i maybe changing to livejournal since blogspot provides so little privacy space HAHA !

2008-10-16T09:52:00.000-07:00

i think that my mind is finally, truly settling down . . .
but no matter what it is, i hold faith close to myself ..
never let anything in the way obstruct or hinder me ..
cause i know what i truly want and what i truly care for ..
let's just hope a miracle happens X))
and CMON a's pls end fast cause i can't take it any longer !

JAY CHOU :
說好的幸福呢

怎么了你累了说好的幸福呢

我懂了不说了爱淡了梦远了

开心与不开心依稀数着你在不舍

那些爱过的感觉都太深刻

我都还记得

你不懂了说好的幸福呢

我错了泪干了放手了后悔了

只是回忆的音乐盒还旋转着

要怎么停呢

2008-10-15T00:59:00.001-07:00

BITCH !

ok seriously this is pissing off my ass too !
FUCKING BITCH ! yeah though i seen many ugly girls before, how disgusted i am by their actions ..
by mind you if u fucking go jisiao others ppl again (especially her) u seriously goona fucking get it from me ..
i meant what i say and when i post it here i know ppl are looking (including my friends) and u better know where u stand ! it will be great if u can even arrive here at my blog looking at this !

even though i don really know you, but ur fucking actions are enough to make me fucking dulan !
nb dare go dao ppl or say ppl 'suay' when ppl walk past you ! don make me turn nasty to you cause ppl know how siao i can get when i hate someone !
its been a dam peaceful 2 years and pls don fucking get me pissed !
AND LAST WORDS FOR YOU : PLEASE DON FUCKING THINK AS IF THE WHOLE WORLD LIKE YOU ! YOU know how u project urself ! 1 word : PATHETIC !

BITCH !

2008-10-15T00:44:00.000-07:00

im always sure of what im doing and this is not an exception too ..
whatever it is, i go with myself
4 more weeks to the end of alvls ! i cant fucking wait anymore !
let this end quick !

2008-10-13T08:24:00.000-07:00

JAY NEW ALBUM IS OUT ! HURRAY PEEPS ! GO BUY IT AND STOP DLING ! =))

SIMPLY loves jay songs ! keeping me accompany since a long long time ago and
always when i feel down or low, i definitely need them to be by my side =))
and this album is no exception , most of the songs are not bad and stop all the bad criticism and i don want to hear any of it ! WOHOO !

i finding ways to upload the songs onto my blog but it just seem impossible ! we shall wait and see if anyone upload it cause i do not know how to do it =/

i shall keep my fingers cross and wait for sth to happen =/

2008-10-12T05:32:00.001-07:00

OH PEOPLE I JUST A SUDDEN URGE TO POST THIS . .
NOWADAYS , LOVE IS REALLY BLIND LOL !

i swear i saw sth dam hilarious today and i cant stop laughing from then on ..
OMFUCKING GOD !
why are there so many couples(weirdos) in the world now which made people feel like laughing ..
and this is much so happening in places where ppl are educated .. i seriously cant stand it man *hair stands*
weirdos i shall declare them to be !
what is this world turning into ? and wat im seeing ?
the emergence of weirdo couples ? LOL !
the world seem to have revolve a complete 360 degree and it just feel weird for me to belong in it
but its really dam funny !
when i was still getting so stressed up from sth, this happens ! OMG give me such a good laugh !
if u people are really interested to know why im so freaking mad and insane now , ask me and i'll show it to u guys lol ! im sure u guys will agree with me ! (provided u are also not some kind of weirdos too) X))

2008-10-11T20:31:00.000-07:00

歌手：萧亚轩

歌曲：冲动

很感激这城市拥挤的交通
让你我还能多相处几分钟
人潮中怕失散所以轻轻拉你的手
一刻不放松不放松
忍不住想要爱你的冲动
不确定你属于我会有点寂寞
你给的幸福在我心中自由走动
抚平我每一个伤口
忍不住想要吻你的冲动
不确定我的执着能让你感动
我只能相信自己感受不怕失落
关于你的一切我想要比谁都懂
我的心是被你设定的闹钟
提醒我想你的时间不够用
为什么平淡的事情现在忽然生动
是你改变我你改变我
你是情人还是朋友
还没勇气想得太多
你的世界如此辽阔
我会在哪个角落

2008-10-10T18:26:00.001-07:00

GRADUATION CEREMONY ! its over . . .

ok it finally marks the end of me being in NYJC ! should i be happy or sad ?
but true enough, when all seems to end again, i felt a tinge of sadness ..
hmm cause the tutors in JC are really cool nt like those u see in sec sch ? (although there are still exceptions)
and the video made by them was like WOW ! yeah teachers are human beings too =))
and yeah seriously speaking, even though our P is a bit naggy but ya he really quite good from my point of view tat is ..
if ppl really get wat he had said since we step into this college its really quite meaningful ..

let me just say a story which he said : (hope i don get it wrong)
a daughter went to ask his dad why there are so much changes in her life and how she can cope it well.
the dad didnt really know how to reply and didnt really have a ans to it
So, he asked her daughter to bring 3 pots.
he put CARROT , EGGS and COFFEE BEANS , into all 3 individual pots.
the dad pour water into the 3 pots and asked the daughter to observe how they change
the daughter observed and said : the carrots turn hard , but for the eggs it turn soft on the inside and for the coffee beans it remain the same but it has blended the water with coffee !
and its up for us to decide how we are goona face the challenges, whether after the changes in our life we have become STRONGER, WEAKER, OR WE REMAIN THE SAME ..
yeah and i definitely choose to be the first =))

and definitely when it all comes to an end ! DB-MATES ! they definitely come into my mind again ! THE PAST YEAR WITH ALL OF YOU WAS REALLY WOW ! i bet all of us deeply cherish the times we have together and its an experience we will even forget ! oh ya for the video which i have yet to send u guys, once i get it all done up, i will start sending it to you guys .. but tat will be like after alvls when i have the time =))

and i really thank nyjc for shaping me into a better person tat is .. and thank them for giving me the oppournity to find my db guys !
after reflecting, a lvls result doesnt matter much to me anymore though being realistic a better result will be better la .. but i really enjoyed so far though at the start i thought i will be like out-casted =/ but yeah no its DAM fun !!

CHEERS for everyone taking alvls AND BEST OF LUCKS ! =)))
waiting . . . . .

2008-10-03T07:03:00.000-07:00

OK I'VE BEEN TRYING TO USE A BETTER MUSIC PLAYER FOR MY BLOG !
but it just seem quite difficult .. anyone who knows how to be able to put 2 player within 1 page in the blog pls tell me cause i cant do it =/
i intend to seperate between english and chinese songs but yeah i have problems doing so ! so who is kind enough please contact me to help me =)) ty !
so for the time being its english and chinese songs together ! ENJOY =))

2008-10-01T10:10:00.001-07:00

YEAH PPL ! prelims are over but here comes the A's lvl WOHOO !
4 and a half more weeks to it and around 7 weeks to the end ? yeah its finally coming to an end !
like finally ! all the things i've been hiding all along, all the shit i always need to endure ..
ITS COMING TO AN END ! WOHOO =)) CHEERS !

although its unbearable at the start , but i have grown to be more mature =))
and yeah since its coming to an end soon , i really wanna thanks all my db mates for this period of time ..
like wat i say time and time again , without db i wouldnt be here !
jus ask me wat i have done these 2 years , i would stuff u all the stuffs bout db =))
cheers , my teammates ! unforgettable experience it is to be . . .

and yeah all my other friends, in less than 2 more months i will be free , its time for me to get back to you guys ..
sorry have been unable to go for most meetings OPPS ! but i'll be free soon .. don ignore me by then lol !
cause i have never forget u guys too =))

this period of growing up seem cool .. from one who simply cant control his temper to one who is so tamed =)) last time i simply cant stand any kp around ; but nw slowly get to realise these are just part and parcel of life .. even if u are buay song there nth much to be angry about ? beat that person up just to vent anger ? i beg to differ from this anymore .. so looking at those typical ah bengs now, its either they go all the way down wasting their life or they will just grow and learn , learn to be a more useful person ..

ppl who know me more than two years ago and nw , most said i have grown up and i think so too =))
and being single aint bad too , in fact to me its better cause i have made so many mistakes in the past =/
in fact its nt easy for me to accept a partner readily now, nt even saying that i will just love a person like i would in the past ..
i'll wait for the one i truly feel comfortable with and that i have confidence in both of us ..
(LOL im like declaring my love statement here OPPS)* (censored)

hey ppl so wait for me , i'll be back in less than 2months ! CLUBBING , DRINKING ! i simply cant wait ! till den STUDY STUDY STUDY =/ BYE ALL !

2008-10-01T10:07:00.000-07:00

Crush

I hung up the phone tonight
Suddenly happy for the first time
Deep inside
It was a rush
What a rush'
Cause the possibility
That you would ever feel the same way
About me
It's just too much
Just too much
Why do I keep running from the truth
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized
So mesmerized
And I've just got to know
Do you ever think
When you're all alone
All that we could be
Where this thing could go
Am I crazy or falling in love
Is it real or just another crush
Do you catch a breath
When I look at you
Are you holding back
Like the way I do'
Cause I'm trying, trying to walk away
But i know this crush ain't going
AwayGoing away
Has it ever crossed your mind
When we're hanging,
Spending time, girl, are we just friends
Is there more
Is there more
See it's a chance we've gotta take
'Cause I believe that we can make this
Into something that'll last
Last foreverForever
Why do I keep running from the truth(Why do I keep running)
All I ever think about is you(All I ever think about)
You got me hypnotized(Hypnotized)
So mesmerized(mesmerized)
And I've just got to know
Going awayGoing away

2008-09-23T06:57:00.000-07:00

C for math ! HURRAY ! after so long i finally did better =))
i know its crazy of me to be so happy about it cause its not like an A ;
BUT its a big improvement for me so HURRAY !

i have not pass math since like last promo man and this seem to be the best in jc; good momentum build for A's
goona start PIA liao ..
yeah ppl even if you don do well don be sad ; cause its never the end !
somemore its only the A's there are many other things in life ya !
but a good start since my rebellious stage that i can think much more maturely ; handling things much better =))
so yeah ppl can confide in me when you need help ; i will be more than willing if i can help

and one most impt thing ppl ; never lose confidence in life and have a goal in mind ..
always keep it in mind and work towards in ..
you will get wat u want and succeed in future ; im sure of it
GOOD LUCK ALL =)) CHEERS !

2008-09-22T04:57:00.000-07:00

POST - PRELIM have been fun =)) but it been just a short 4 days =/ TATS TOO SHORT !
but i have been drinking quite a lot during these few days but ENJOYED IT !

and going back to sch tmr getting back some of prelim results ..
i knew tat it will be quite disappointing for sure but jus gotta face it wohoo !
like wat derek say A lvls is the goal ; prelim is just another mini test =))

just finish watching tat last episode of channel 8 7pm show ..
seem quite touching; but its hard to find this kind of real love in real life though
hard to find one which i have both confidence in myself and the other =/
but i will still keep the goal in mind, not forcing myself to give in =))

oh ya maybe updating some photos soon =)) STAY TUNED !

2008-09-11T05:17:00.000-07:00

yeah ppl all the stupid studying have simply driving me mad !
i bet everyone was like shocked that im studying ! yeah me too
but wat can i do ? this is reality in spore so FACE THE FACT =/

everyone mugging like super hard and wats mine compared to the rest man !
ppl can like sleep for less than 4 hours and study while i will jus continue my sleep for like 9 hours =/
goona be the end of the week and completing half the prelims ..
hmm wat can i say; not of it was really well done ;
so wat if i can pass; its like less than 50 days to a lvls ..
i will just try my best and i believe there are other routes out there if i don make it here OH YEAH !

i cant believe it man ! 2 years me before and now ; its like extreme makeover ..
make a video of me man ppl ! LOL !
hmm i better stop grumbling and back to study
GOOD LUCK EVERYONE ! =))

i cant wait for all these to end ;
where i can spend time with wat i really wanna do ..

2008-08-28T05:20:00.000-07:00

Singer: Jason Mraz
Title of Song: I'm Yours

well you done done me and you bet i felt it
i tried to get you but you're so hot that i melted
i fell right through the cracks
and i'm trying to get back
before the cool done run out
i'll be giving it my bestest
nothin's going to stop me but devine intervention
i reckon its again my turn to win some or learn some
i won't hesitate no more
no more it cannot wait, i'm yours
well open up your mind and see like me
open up your plans and damn you're free
look into your heart and you'll find love love love
listen to the music of the moment maybe sing with me
ah la peaceful melody
its your godforsaken right to be loved love loved love love
so i won't hesitate no more
no more it cannot wait i'm sure
theres no need to complicate
our time is short
this is our fate, i'm yours
i been spending way too long checking my tongue in the mirror
and bendin over backwards just to try to see it clearer
my breath fogged up the glass
so i drew a new face and laughed
i guess what i'm sayin is there ain't no better reason
to rid yourself of vanity and just go with the seasons
its what we aim to do
our name is our virtue
i won't hesitate no more
no more it cannot wait i'm sure
theres no need to complicate
our time is short
it cannot wait, i'm yours

ENJOY THIS NICE, LOVELY SONG ! =))

2008-08-03T02:26:00.000-07:00

YEAH PEOPLE ; DERRICK HE WEI JIAN ALBUM IS OUT !
i remember last time i was crazy bout him ; like 3 years ago ? i thought after so many years his album wont even be released cause by then he will lose like most of his fans BUT no its out =))
and i heard some of the songs already and its quite nice; gotta buy the album soon
so ppl go buy and enjoy singaporean guys singing ! =))
its really nice
his bloglink : http://derricksrubbishbin.blogspot.com/
as the minutes passes, the more i think of you IMU !

2008-08-01T23:09:00.000-07:00

STUDY ! STUDY ! STUDY !
let all the distractions be gone . .
LET IT ALL DISAPPEAR AT THIS MOMENT !

thinking ; lingering in my mind ; in my mind there no one but YOU =/
and i simply cant get you off my mind ! SUCK SUCK SUCK !
when I SHOULD BE STUDYING !

i hate this kind of stupid feeling coming back into my life ;
maybe i just gotta face the fact ;
but there NO WAY im goona face it now ; yeah nt now

2008-07-24T05:52:00.000-07:00

hmm, yeah its been long again since i blog !
so ya definitely im been too into Euro 08 during the holidays leading to my atrocious mid year results ..
but like always i dont give a dam cause i never regret what i have done =))
AND YEAH SPAIN FTW ! X))

the start of this term has been considered kind of weird .. dunno why i get this feeling but it just feel so .. study is one thing but other distractions have been simply hindering my progress =/ nvm i will TRY my very best to really mug real hard just for this 4 months left , and i hope i can =)) heard so many motivations to study and i know i must, been studying but there still to be a pause towards the goal i really want .. i hope i will figure it out sooner or later ..

When u look me in your eyes, and tell me that you love me
everything alrights, when you are right here by side
When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
I find my paradise.

the closer it gets, the more afraid i get ..
just kinda weird, and yeah i simply need more time MANY MANY MORE ..
argh ! this kinda feeling suck for me ! SUCK BIG TIME !
when will i take the one step out again ?
or maybe you can , to bring me out of this SHIT ..

2008-05-31T10:37:00.001-07:00

OMG ! 11ST FOR MENS TEAM IN FIRST NIGHT RACE IN SINGAPORE - SUNDOWN MARATHONS !
NYDB FTW !

11 position
TEAM 1231 : Nydb
Total timing : 03:35:59.40

Members :
Derek HO
10.5km : 00:52:55.96
5.25km : 00:26:41
Ken Tat LEE
10.5km : 00:52:44.91
5.25km : 00:26:41
Wei Xing GOH
10.5km : 00:55:11.75
5.25km : 00:26:48
Zheng Hui NG
10.5km : 00:55:06.78
5.25km : 00:26:50

damit ! if my fucking shoelace never came out, i may have run slightly better =/ cause after i continue running from the freaking stop on tying my shoelace, stitches start coming from everywhere lol ! but nvm im definitely more than happy =)) MORE MARATHONS ! goona run every week from now !

yeah ppl its 2am nw and im dam freaking tired and its time to sleep ; though im still dam elated from it till i cant sleep lol ! AND MY BIRTHDAY IS IN JUS ONE DAYS TIME ! I WILL BE 18 ! WOHOO !

cya ppl who are meeting me on my birthday ! and ppl msg me to wish me lol ! dunno my hp number go ask from others ! take care all !

2008-05-28T05:02:00.000-07:00

YEAH ! I DAMMIT LOVE THIS SONG ! ENJOY !
WITH YOU !~
I need you boo, (Ooh)
I gotta see you boo (Hey)
And the hearts all over the world tonight,
Said the hearts all over the world tonight
Hey! Little mama,
Ooh, you a stunna Hot..lil figure,
Yes, you a winner
And im so glad to be yours,
You're a class all your own
And Ooh, little cutie
When you talk to me I swear..the whole world stops
You're my sweetheart
And im so glad that you are mine
You are one of a kind and..
You mean to me
What i mean to you and..
Together baby,
There is nothing we won't do
Cos if i gotchu, I don't need money, I don't need cars,
Girl, you're my all. And..
Oh! I'm into you,
And girl,
No one else would do,
Cause with every kiss and every hug,
You make me fall in love,
And now I know I can't be the only one,
I bet his heart's all over the world tonight,
With the love of his life who feel..
Wat i feel when i'm With you Girl.. With you
Oh Girl ! I don't want nobody else,
Without you, there's no one left then,
You're like Jordans on Saturday,
I gotta have you and I cannot wait now,
Hey! little shawty,
Say you care for me,
You know I care for you,
You know that I'll be true,
You know that i won't lie,
You know that i would try,
To be your everything yeah..
Cause if i got you, I don't need money, I don't need cars,
Girl, you're my all. And..
Oh! I'm into you,
And girl, No one else would do,
Cuz with every kiss and every hug,
You make me fall in love,
And now I know I can't be the only one,
I bet his heart's all over the world tonight,
With the love of they life who feel..
Wat i feel when i'm With you Ohh..
With you Yeah Heh..
And I Will never try to deny,
Cuz you are my whole light,
Cuz if you ever let me do, I would die..
So I won't find,
I don't need another woman,
I just need your all and nothing,
Cos' if I got that,
And I'll be straight Baby, you're the best part of my needs
I need you boo,
I gotta see you boo And the hearts all over the world tonight,
Said the hearts all over the world tonight
Woo Ooohh.. Yeah~
They need it boo, They gotta see their boo,
Said the hearts all over the world tonight,
Hearts all over the world tonight

the past are all but illusions ; when will i ever find the real you ; the one who i will cherish with all my hearts ..
yeah ! where will be the place i found you ? when will the time comes ?
still waiting for YOU =))
time will tell . . .
and yes girl you bet i will never let you escape from my arms ever again
holding on without a doubt;
for eternity ( jus random stuff )

2008-05-28T04:24:00.000-07:00

YEAH IM BACK ! i know i dam long never blog already =/
AND PEOPLE ! MY B'DAE IS COMING REAL SOON =))
TURNING 18 ! WOHOO FEELING SO DAM EXCITED !
so when i turn 18 ,
i can go clubbing and pubs with ease,
go singapore pools and bet without worrying,
go drinking or x(smoking)x without being caught,
m18 shows, ya i know its nt much of a diff
but for a face which look much lesser den 18 its makes a difference lol !
and wats more is there ? feel free to tell me LOL !

SO my life been studying and coms =/ ok tats sounds so boring but yeah nth much to do since a lvls is just coming round the corner .. gotta really force myself to start studying this JUNE holidays but i will simply enjoy myself before i really cant ! so yeah , i must prepare lots of line-up for this holidays =))

31th MAY - Sundown marathon 1st even night run in singapore and yeah im taking part in the team race, but hmm its only a short run 10km only lol .. and im beginning to be worried bout it cause its being quite some time since i really run, but i going to do so tomorrow !

JUNE - my birthday ! yeah ppl ask me out tat day =)) don't leave me alone like a loner lol =x
but if i don have time den too bad but i think i have more than ample of time =/

and i cant find any1 else really interested in CLICK FIVE concert and its this SUNDAY ! so if there any other ppl who really wanna go with me, feel free to tell me =))

till den i cant think of anymore things to do ! PPL WHO GOING CLUBBING JIO ME TOO ! i know its been a long time since i went but yeah jus tell me ! I WILL go ! lol

and singapore sale just started, things are really going at a cheaper price do go out shopping ! and as usual who want me shop with them do give me a call too !
last, THOSE WHO ARE REALLY SERIOUS BOUT STUDYING ALSO CAN FIND ME =))

lol i im like trying to be studying and enjoying myself during this holidays !
hope it will be fun ! take care all !

2008-05-03T20:08:00.000-07:00

ok MANY people have been asking me to update, i really mean MANY ! lol
and ya many keep asking me; after db nth to update le ar ? hmm in actual fact, this seem quite true ..
i still do miss ROWING with the TEAM ! seriously, its jus feel different now and before but i know i shouldnt harp on for so long so yeah a BRAND NEW START AGAIN =))

As the db career of my batch ends, HERE COME THE NEW BATCH ! lets see how much they can cherish the times together and enjoying themselves even in days of sufferings *smiles*

hmm, sometimes it just appear that im jus cheating myself in the end .. i told myself ample of times that after db i will start studying, but yeah tat definitely nt my type and this feeling suck to the max ! a lvl in just 6 months time and im still here idling away .. MAYBE im jus nt the cream of the crop of all the MUGGERS in spore ! LOL ! still missing the time where i can have fun with my dbmates =(( life changes and MAYBE in one month time, i may just well become the next mugger (as if) !

but good news i got an 'A' for pw .. lol sth to be happy about ? but i know its quite unless for uni admission so its still useless anyway .. Block test suck obviously but i didnt expect most subjects to pass and i gt a DAM DAM DAM bad grade for gp ! im so dead even if others do well and my gp fail , im still a GONER zz =/ ok i should stop talking bout results cause i gt nth much to say .. and yeah i gotta convince myself tat studying is blessing in disguise .. how i wish it is =x

and yeah ppl i gt a new hobby- gambling LOL ! this is definitely nt sth good hahas but i believe i inherit it from my dad side cause everyone from there seem to gamble .. be it 4d,toto,mahjong,poker and for me soccer =)) but they are freaking rich people while a broke kid like me lost a lot .. and suayness is sth i simply cant shake off lol ! the losing streak been with me for dam long, though 2 weeks back im still happy with my winnings and now its all gone plus a huge deficit Zz =/ and yeah gambling seriously is BAD ! bad bad bad !

and tat makes me a bad person; chi he piao du OMG ! it match me ? SHIT ! LOL im deem as a sinful person =/ but sth i used to do in the past, nw im nt (which i dunno y) .. im sure those who are close will know what i mean .. dunno is it i lost my attraction or is it other ppl doesnt seem to be attracting mine attention LOL ! lets jus wait and see =)) ps : a small sign is hinting me to .. but should i ?

like any GP essay there will also be a conclusion for you to reiterate your points .. for one stupid reason or another, this REALLY is the FIRST time i have so much feelings for a TEAM , a SPORT or jus a normal CCA .. for a rebellious kid like me in the past shouldnt been thinking this way but yeah this sport really change me and its really a 360degree change !

BACK TO REALITY, I SHOULD just START STUDYING NOW =/

2008-04-12T21:24:00.000-07:00

PEOPLE, MY DAYS AS A DRAGONBOATER IS OVER !
NO MORE ROWING WITH MY TEAM ANYMORE !
NO MORE PADDLES !
NO MORE WAKING UP EARLY IN THE MORNING, NO MATTER HOW TIRED U ARE !
NO MORE WARM-UP RUNS TOGETHER !
NO MORE WARM-UP (CHANGE,EASY) TOGETHER !
NO MORE GOING DOWN TO KALLANG FOR TRAININGS !
NO MORE PUSHING TO OUR MAX !
NO MORE SHITTY FEELINGS, SUFFERINGS !
NO MORE JOKES AND LAUGHTERS WITH MY TEAM BEFORE TRAININGS !
NO MORE BATHING TOGETHER AT THE STADIUM WITH MY TEAM !
NO MORE HAVING LUNCH/DINNER WITH MY TEAM AFTER TRAININGS !
NO MORE COACHING FROM 'AH HEE' !
NO MORE DRUMMING FOR ME !
NO MORE ROWING FOR ME AS A NYJC DBOATER !
NO MORE FARTLEKS TOGETHER !
NO MORE GYM SESSION TOGETHER !
NO MORE EVALUATION AS A TEAM !
NO MORE TEAM TALK !
NO MORE 'SAH' TOGETHER !
NO MORE LAST CHEER AS A TEAM o7-o8 batch !
NO MORE RACES FOR US !
NO MORE TAKING BUS '16' TOGETHER !
NO MORE FUN, JOY, LAUGHTERS, SUFFERINGS, AS A TEAM TOGETHER !
all the ' NO MOREs' ! yes our career as a NYJC dboater HAD ENDED !

as im typing all this, tears seem to flow down uncontrollably. YES TEAM I DO MISS YOU GUYS DAM DAM DAM MUCH THOUGH ONE DAYS HAVE JUS PASSED ! i dunno how im going to survive thus all the way to a lvls. i seriously dont. for this past one year, we all made our sacrifices and everyone of us giving all we can for the TEAM !
yes in the past we used to have misunderstandings about each other and at that time it was hard was us to bond. BUT NOW WHAT HAVE BECOME OF US IS ONE TEAM , ONE NYDB !
the tears we shed on 12 april had not gone to waste, its for this team ! the team which we had found and the team which we are proud of ! THE TEAM that truly belong to us ! NO REGRETS !
even the seniors had seen how much we have change, how much more we now cherish our TEAM and how difficult it is for us to part now =((
its time to let go but these memories will always be etched in my mind and will never be forgotten. I LOVE YOU GUYS !
MY TEAM HAS MATURE AND IM PROUD OF EACH AND EVERYONE !
winning is never impt to us ! ONE SILVER MEDAL IN 2o mens is ENOUGH for us to remember the experiences we gone through together as a TEAM !
take care all and all the best in future !
your 'one and only golden drummer', angelbear
hope he will never be forgotten in the hearts of you guys !
i have done everything i could; NO regrets !
REMEMBER THE LAST MST I GIVEN TO U GUYS =))
but for now im goona be emo-ing for the next few days . . . . .
='((

2008-04-06T04:35:00.000-07:00

GUYS, THANKS EVERYONE FOR GIVING ALL OUT FOR EVERY RACES TODAY, ESPECIALLY FOR THE LAST RACE WHERE YOU GUYS FOUGHT FOR ME AS WELL !
I APPRECIATE THAT, THANKS LOTS !

today marks the last 2o men boat im in as a rower =(( definitely im dam dam dam sad bout it, but knowing you guys fought for me im happy enough. nearly cried after the race, but seeing how tired everyone was, how everyone give it all during last charge. NO REGRETS GUYS, I SHOULD INSTEAD BE HAPPY ABOUT IT ! 3rd in minor finals for the guys MASTER SERIES o8 - our very first and last of the year !

yes our fitness level may have drop a little, but i think its only tat little bit, and true enough MR 5oo may just be our peak. but we cant guage how well we can perform if everyone have everything it takes to win the 'gold' medal back !
there nth much to change in our fitness, technique and our game plan ! its all fixed - the last we can do is our mentality ! i realise without having everything in place is wat cause us nt able to perform as well as before. we need someone to take the initiative. nvm there will be me in a'div =)) but remember composure and confidence. MOST IMPTLY THE FIGHTING SPIRIT, THE AGGRESIVENESS. all these were lost till our last race for today !

work on it for this one last week ! i believe we can do it ! after this we can do whatever we want ! OUR LAST 1 WEEK ! and one thing, we haven get the feeling of rowing for the TEAM ! maybe it will happen on a'div or maybe it will nt ! lets jus see how it goes !
A'div i will try my very best to do all i can ! hope you will believe in me and we triumph as a TEAM all 21 of us - celebrating with the medals belonging to us, a memory for our db career !
CMON , nw its our last charge !

2008-04-05T03:08:00.000-07:00

1 MORE WEEK TO A'DIV - THE TIME WHERE o7-o8 batch will step down =/

tomorrow will be our MASTER series o8 - the very first and last MASTER we will get to row !
stay compose, have confidence and we be able to do the same like what we have been doing
and like wat 'ah hee' say, its jus a normal routine =))

from my video, we can see how we have grown - from the past to the present
and we nt jus grown bigger in size but also in how we bond together as a TEAM
yes many of us (especially me) do not really want to part in jus 1 weeks time, but hmm we jus have to =((
and remember guys : DON BE SAD TAT OUR CAREER ARE ENDING, BUT BE HAPPY THAT WE FOUND THIS TEAM THAT TRULY BELONGS TO US !
the feeling of rowing not jus for the goal but most imptly for the TEAM in every races, definitely we will feel good no matter whatever the results are, as long as we give it all we have WITH NO REGRETS !

LETS AIM TO GET INTO GRAND FINALS AGAIN ! AND BE FULLY PREPARED FOR OUR LAST RACE ON 12 APRIL ! ITS OUR TIME TO PROVE OURSELF FOR THE VERY LAST TIME TOGETHER !
21 men we will go down owning that place, and lets jus hope we wont cry at any moment =/

nothing much is to be change now, lets jus go down giving out all we have, and all that we have learn !

lastly, initiation for j1s was jus ok, since it rain DAMIT ! nvm as seniors we try to teach them as much as we can, telling them what will be best for them and not repeat the mistakes we have made, this is impt.
j1s will be taking over us real soon, and hope they will keep up with our standard or do even much better =))

GOOD LUCKS GUYS ! STAY TUNE FOR A'DIV !

2008-03-22T01:02:00.000-07:00

SO LONG, GOODBYE MY BLOCK TEST =))
A'div is just around the corner = my db career is ending soon =/
11o4o7 - 12o4o8 = o7o8 NYJCDB, my loved batch

block test is lke so screwed but who cares; i don give a dam to anything else till a div end ! life was great FUN FUN FUN =)
but i know everything is jus goona end real soon; yes it will
its nt tat im getting too emotional or im a 'cry baby' or wat
i myself feel FCUKED up if u really think this way
i never even shed a single tear since i was pri one for a promise i made
but last a div this promise was broken , the seniors was simply a dam good bunch of people; rowing their last race as a TEAM together, cherishing sth which they know it be the last. giving it all they have and yes they did it !
now is us, wat yvonne say make sense; it takes time for us to realise this : we are working for the TEAM and not jus the goal ! yes it takes time for everyone to feel it. maybe it could be the last race tat we finally realise it, but i know deep in our hearts most of us are already beginning to feel it.
ITs not me who is being too emotional, but if u truly love this TEAM and u jus feel it i bet u will too, sooner or later. crying your heart out not because u are disappointed, but the love you have for the TEAM. i bet if all of us witness the things tat happen in our senior boat, we will definitely have the same feeling like what they had.

CMON jus think of it, wat gather us together for 1 years plus, meeting each other nearly less than 24/7 everyday, the FUN , LAUGHTERS , DISAPPOINTMENT , HAPPINESS , ALL THE OBSTACLES WE MANAGE TO OVERCOME AS A TEAM tgther. jus think of it; the days we are left with are limited, we may not be able to feel all this together again anymore. last few and it will jus come to an end.
WAT GATHER US AS A GUYS TEAM 21 OF US IT THE LOVE WE HAVE FOR THE TEAM AND THE PASSION FOR THE SPORT DRAGONBOAT ! i doubt anyone will disagree with me if not u wouldnt be still in the TEAM.

so on the 8th national school championship dragonboat, 21 of us is going to row together not jus for the goal(gold) but also for the TEAM
the TEAM which we respect,love,suffer,laugh,play,study together. we wont forget this path we been through together ever !
WHATEVER WE DO, IT WILL ALWAYS BE A TEAM, ONE NYJC TEAM !
nothing will change this.
=(

MR 500 !

2008-03-09T21:36:00.000-07:00

WELL DONE TEAM FOR MR 500 !
CONGRATS TO GALS FOR THE SILVER MEDAL AND GUYS FOR BEATING STRONG TEAM SUCH AS NTU,NJC NP AND GETTING INTO BOTH TERTIARY FINALS AND GRAND FINAL FOR THE OPENS CATEGORY ! WOHOO !

GLORY ! GLORY ! GLORY !
i simply cant contain my happiness ! the feelings just feel so dam good !
valuable and priceless experiences, thats what a TEAM is made up of !
I TELL U I WILL REMEMBER THIS FOR LIFE ! THANKS EVERYONE FOR MAKING IT POSSIBLE !

GIVING ALL FOR ALL RACES, THE EXPRESSIONS FROM ALL YOU GUYS , ITS STILL VIVID IN MY MEMORY ! ALL THE SAH, WE SHOUT IT ALL FROM OUR HEARTS ! IF IT WAS POSSIBLE TO SIMPLY CAPTURE ALL THESE, IT WILL BE SO WONDERFUL =))

WE HAVE MADE OUR MARK, IT IS THE EFFORT FROM ANY SINGLE ONE OF US, WITHOUT ANY 'ONE' IT WILL NOT HAVE BEEN POSSIBLE ! HOPE YOUR APPRECIATE ALL MY SHOUTINGS ALSO =X LOL !

THANKS FOR EVERYONE WHO CAME DOWN TO SUPPORT US, IM SURE YOU ALL ARE PROUD OF US ! SPECIAL THANKS TO IKTHIA(BLACK) AND YVOONE ! =)) you ppl are jus so wonderful, i hope i can do so in future too haha !

TEAM, BELIEVE IN OURSELF AND WE KNOW FROM NOW ON, WE WILL SOAR AS A TEAM ! BEATING ALL OBSTACLES, CHALLENGING OUT LIMITS ! LAI AR !
NAN CHU HUAT AR ! HOCK KI AR ! AI ZAI ! LOVE U TEAM !

2008-03-06T03:29:00.000-08:00

MR 500 , the place where we fight with champions and whether to emerge above them is all up to us !

its great tat training has been good since then, rowing was fun everyone simply feels great ! watever we do , do it as a TEAM ! tats wat we are going to aim for and to show others wat we truly are !

as everyone know our first race on MR 500 is going to be tough, NTU NUS NJC NP AND NYJC(us) ; but remember this all of us have been training all we can ! CONFIDENCE is wat we need tat day; don care who our opponents are and simply row a perfect set !
i know it may not be easy not to be fearless of them; but jus tink of the times we pace with NTU, think of all the trainings we gone through together ; all we gotta do is to stay compose and not to screw up any of the races like we did in the past.

3 impt things :
first row as a team together = good coordination , we have the drive and are pushing for every training but good coordination is wat we seem to be still lacking in.
second stay compose = don lose yourself on the day of race, and don let go of your power at any point stay focus; know wat we have to do
last and most imptly HAVE CONFIDENCE IN yourself ! don be afraid ! once you are afraid, its GG game over ! once u are afraid, we can forget about the first few things. the most is to have slight nervousness cause you know you are competing against others, other than tat throw away all the other thoughts you have ! DON THINK ABOUT THE OUTCOME BUT TO ROW OUR BEST !

like wat we always say, we know we can and believe in it ! IN MY HEARTS, WE ARE ALREADY A CHAMPION TEAM !
BELIEVE IN EVERYONE IN THE TEAM ! work towards the perfect, best set we can ever row !
and trust me if im the drummer =)) hang on in every race cause you know your other teammates will never give up, so are you !

CMON LETS PSYCH OURSELF UP FOR THIS LAST PART OF OUR NYDB CAREER , WE ALL KNOW ITS COMING TO AN END SOON ! NO REGRETS ! ALL THE WAY ! SAH ! NYDB o7-o8 - cant bear for anything to a stop, i will brave myself not to shed a tear (shit getting too emotional). most imptly i know we can do it ! GLORY will come and we will only shed our tears out of happiness.

2008-02-24T02:59:00.000-08:00

TRAININGS WAS WONDERFUL THIS WEEK !
CMON GUYS KEEP THIS SPIRIT UP ALL THE WAY TILL OUR CAREER END !
AND LETS CHERISH THIS MOMENT WE ENJOY =))

hey peeps, it jus feels good to row as a TEAM now rite; every stroke we apply jus to make sure the boat surge forward; the feeling is jus damit good !
even though i return home all shag nw but i know everyone can feel tat all we are doing nw is worth it; for this TEAM where we bonded as one !

actually i myself have found out some misunderstandings in the TEAM; but nvm its feel all so great nw ! LET'S KEEP UP THE SPIRIT ! its no use for onli a few to have it; everyone plays a part ! POWER ! we will treat every trainings onwards to be an enjoyable one ; and trust me i will do all i can for de TEAM; all de way for nw till a div ! believe in me guys and right now we are progressing well ! HAVE FAITH; BELIEVE IN YOURSELF MAN AND TELL U WAT; WE WILL FUCKING BEAT ALL THE OTHER OPPONENTS ! this will come true im sure !

nth much for me to sae anymore; cuz it jus works out way too good now =))
CMON WE ROCK AND ROW !!

2008-02-15T04:25:00.000-08:00

its been some time since i last post ; ok is still on db matters =))
before saying anything; i wanna express my love for my NYDB TEAM even though i said ample times before but im goona jus sae it again; for de guys i truly really believe we haf bonded tgther as one ! unless any of u disagree and certainly dere bound to be cliques but as a whole we are A TEAM ; a team which we are proud to be !

im definitely happy again tat my guys don give up so easily nw; i could see it in everyone of u; and we are slowly closing up de gap between de first and the last .. CMON guys we know we can do it but is how we are going to maximise our potential to de fullest, we all know tat its less den 2 months left; de speeches i can give; de things is i can say anymore is limited .. we are nearing de end ! as im typing this; it realli sound quite depressing ! BUT REMEMBER OUR BATCH WILL FINISH IT WITH A BIG BANG; nt jus tat but for everyone to remember us ! how can we do tat ? we know we gotta beat NJ and to clinch the overall championship back to NANYANG ! EVERY SINGLE TRAINING GOONA BE IMPT ! MR 500 race next ; definitely de results will affect our mood which we goona bring to a div; but jus have confidence in yourself and we know we can succeed .. lack in confidence is wat always fail us; let us not repeat de mistake again !

WHO SAYS OUR TEAM CANT MAKE IT ? WHO SAYS THAT WE CANT EVEN COMPARE TO OUR SENIORS ? WHO GIVE U THE RIGHT TO COMMENT ON US ? WE ARE GOONA SHOW U WAT THIS BATCH OF NYJC DBOATERS 2oo7-2oo8 GOONA WIN AND THRASH DE OTHER TEAMS UPSIDE DOWN !
i mean wat i say; it will happen ; jus watch it !

no more big changes can be made nw and we jus gotta cherish de trainings we haf left and the times we get to row tgther ; jus think (if u read to here) think of these questions : THINK OF THE PEOPLE WHO HAVE HELP U ALONG THE WAY IN UR DB CAREER; THINK OF ALL UR DBMATES WHO HAVE BEEN THROUGH DE SAME SUFFERINGS U BEEN THROUGH; THINK OF ALL DE OBSTACLES WE HAVE ALL CROSS TOGETHER ; and lastly THINK OF THE COMMITMENT AND SACRIFICES U MADE FOR THE TEAM ! if u are able to ans it nw in ur mind; YES u have done it ; a truly NYDB DBOATER ! yes we are definitely proud of wearing our bailong shirt; and we are going to continue to shine with it !

3more races; CHERISH EVERY RACE ! and DON EVER THINK OF GIVING UP ! CUZ IN NYDB DERE IS NO LIMITS TO ANYTHING ! WE KNOW WE CAN DO IT CUZ ALL OF US HAVE GIVE IT ALL FOR EVERYTHING WE DO !
TRUST ME : GLORY WILL COME ON APRIL 12 ! it will

NAN CHU AI ZAI !

2008-01-29T07:47:00.000-08:00

i hope all of us feel better after de thrash talk ; we all KNOW wat we want to ACHIEVE ; GLORY ON APRIL 12 !
and im sure all of u now do feel for de TEAM ; all de things we been through even de tiny little obstacles we face ; ALL this is worth to CHERISH !

anyway; i still wanna stress tat CONFIDENCE is VERY impt in our team ; tat wats fail us most of de time and we gotta boost our morale dam high before any race .. REMEMBER tat u are not rowing ALONE ; 21 of us play a part in it ; nth will fail us if our hearts beat as ONE !

pacing with the NTU shows where we are ; and im sure our efforts are slowly being recognised ; but can we relate this to competition ? tats de phase where most of us are worried ; but we goona prove ourself in MASTERS in March and de confidence we have will be brought on to A div ; the time where we soar !
REMEMBER GUYS : its been a long time since any1 beaten njc in a div and they have been sort of the 'undisputed' champion ..
if we realli wanna beat dem ; we goona give all it takes ; NO CONSERVE ; NO GIVING UP at any point of de time !
2 + months left and i believe we can do it ! MANY OF US THINK SO TOO ! wat are we waiting for ? this is de time to start training real extremely hard !

1 total week of break for nw except rowing but after this START training all we can ! CMON i believe we can ! and don take me as *bull-shiting* !
ITS NOW OR NEVER !

2008-01-25T06:33:00.000-08:00

NYDB o7-o8 batch is at their last stride to de end of their career ..
how are they goona end it with ? with a big bang or simply a scrappy one ?

i believe all of u do know this is the last stretch already ! damit crucial ; wat are we goona do ? u all know best !
thrash talk for guys 2morrow ; tink is de last one ; accept wat others say and lets improve tgther ; NO HARD FEELINGS PLS !
and im realli proud to sae tat im damit proud of MY guys TEAM ; we all rock don we ?
and this is for de whole NYDB TEAM ; i feel tat be it de guys or gals we simply lack CONFIDENCE ; CMON we been training so hard wat are we scared of ? unless u tink u never train hard enough ? ask urself this .. LACK OF CONFIDENCE SIMPLY LEADS TO FAILURE !

and for de guys TREAT EVERY TRAINING AS A SERIOUS ONE ; nt jus when mr lee come down ; limited trainings left ; it will be over before we know it so CMON give in ur best shot in all ! and go see de yahoo post if u haven ; mr lee has plan a training plan for us ; seem tough but lets endure through it tgther ; dont we always done tat ? REMEMBER : DERE NO LIMITS IN NYDB ; the person u gotta beat is YOU !

AI ZAI NAN CHU LONG ZHOU ! SAH !

2008-01-18T18:28:00.000-08:00

From now on till a div, everything in here will only contain bout db stuff unless i feel emo on any other days hahas
so db ppl mus visit hor and de others up to u LOL ..

so now we have 21 guys left; 27 trainings left before we are all gone and it will be hard for all of us to row tgther again; cherish de times we have left and lets train hard from NOW ON ! its still nt too late we gotta give in everything for this last stride ..

forget about de unhappy past and lets look forward; everyone gotta give it all
EVERYONE IN THE BOAT PLAY A PART AND IS DEFINITELY IMPT; NO ONE IS TO BE LEFT OUT

jus a short comment first ( wat i feel ) : firstly, the guys team seriously have become stronger since last Masters; everyone have been training real hard tat can be seen .. but once everyone is working hard and someone did nt do as much as others; u guys know wat will happen; people will just find faults in you
so EVERYONE GOTTA JUST TRAIN EQUALLY HARD !
no one wanna regret after a div and believe in this u will jus feel shitty if u goona slack nw or nt train extremely hard now !

1st thing; i know for de last few weeks especially start of de year i know i haf nt been realli training real hard; u guys know wat happen to me; and for those few weeks i jus went home straight after sch ;i did nt feel any better den and i realise my fitness drop ..
but remember wat i said on previous training; everyone is to give it all till a div; i mean wat i say; and u all agree so i presume everyone is goona do so .. and nw is de most crucial part of our db career in NYDB !

i admit nearly giving up this pathway halfway through but is all u guys who encourage each other or so; in one way or another .. so is everyone goona wake their minds up and give it all from now on ?

there may be a thrash talk soon; wat i want to sae is tat its nt sth to spoil any of our relationships but to improve for de best of our abilites; accept wat others say and we strive together .. NYDB realli means a lot to me; any downfall realli can upset me dam much; im sure most of u feel de same too; many ppl ask me y i don want have gf; simple cause i already treat db as my gf hahas sound lame but i really take this team seriously ..

ok how will u guys treat your gf; of course u try ur very best to make her happy everyday; do sth more jus to make her feel better with you; and cherish de times with her ;for me i jus feel its de same as NYDB team .. we meet each other dam often sometimes even less den 12 hours or so; we train tgther pia tgther (bath tgther=x); and of course some of us will go for the extra miles and train extremely hard; most of us will also cherish de times we have in de boat .. NYDB IS OUR LIFE; if any of us do not have de passion; we will not stay to now i believe ..

ALL OUT FROM NOW ON ; AND I BELIEVE IN IT; ALL US WANT GLORY ON 12 APRIL AND IM NO EXCEPTION ..
i know plain talking is useless so lets work hard from now !!

2008-01-18T18:17:00.000-08:00

IM BACK =))

AND ON 18/o1/o8 , its been such a long time since i felt so darn happy;
JAY CHOU CONCERT WAS LOVES LOVES LOVES !

this concert was simply wonderful cuz it was on his bdae *grins* ! and now jay chou realli sing much much beta than before ! and all u ppl out dere stop saying wat jay singing was mubling ; cuz its nt true at all !

as always i love de part where jay waas playing de piano and singing; it was darn darn nice ! tui hou;an jing; zui chang de dian ying; cai hong; kai bu liao kou; argh ! all is so dam nice ! who wanna go kbox soon jio me out =)) * and i will be snatching de mic singing all jay chou songs x))
u need to be dere to feel it; especially bu neng shuo de mi mi he sing with dam lots of feelings ! argh when will be de next time ?
i shall not say anything more cuz i still cant get over de excitement wohoo ! pics upload next time ba .. tats all !
*current song* zui chang de dian ying*

2007-12-31T00:46:00.000-08:00

LAST DAY OF 2007 !
is it sth to be remember or forgotten ?

SO IN YEAR 2007 , it was a big change for me YEAP !
be it psychically, mentally or my character everything simply change for me =/
good ? bad ? no ones know but i still love de days i been through

Dragonboat truly play a big part of my life this year and i truly love all my teammates !
de days we been through i tink none of us will ever forget it
forget de disappointments and try to move on ; since we want to cont den we mus make de best of it

hmm frenz and bros yes definitely dam impt to me ; cant live without u guys =))
i know i wont be left out by u guys ! x))

and my character definitely change ; i was nt as rebellious nt as kaopei ( instead being kp by ppl nw =/ ) nt as violence LOL !
better ba i guess but i still feel weird for myself X.X

gals was definitely quite out of my life tis year hahas for de first time ? LOL
wait till i found one tat i cant miss =p *smiles*

WISH DE BEST FOR EVERYONE NEXT YEAR ! AND CHHEERS !
my wishes for next year
- NYDBo7-o8 will still stay as one ; regardless of whether we left or stay
- wish de best of health and bo tai ji for my bros and frenz
- more nice clothings ( i will be desparately finding nice clothings for de meantime)
- more $$ la nt enough LOL
- good results =))
- teachers don come kp by or i give u twice back *winks*

tats all ba if nt tats nt wishes le lol TATS ALL

TAKE CARE ALL =)))))))

2007-12-23T20:24:00.000-08:00

ITS XMAS EVE ! WOHOO =)) ( leave aside all de unhappiness )

can u feel it ? xmas is coming ! ok this year nt much atmosphere around but with friends around xmas is always splendid
show u guys sth

ABSOLUTE DISCO (limited ed) actually its nth much jus tat dey add de outer casing lol .. it suppose to be a giftpack but its so dam nice i rather keep it myself =)) any1 want ta drink jio me out den x)

digress a bit; dere still tons of hw left for me and im sure i cant complete it before holidays , but who cares ? Zz ;pia when sch reopen lo =/ and to those nchs peeps coming to NYJC next year ; WELCOME =))

and as usual; i will be tinking wat to wear later; and sad to sae i haven been shopping for like 3 months ? half a year ? DAMIT ! simply nt much time or either i see nth nice or freak tat moment im BROKE lol ; WHO WANT SHOPPING JIO ME TOO ! ( guys onli ) lol

hmm ok im cam-whoring myself again =/ this will be wat i gonna wear yep ; those going out with me later hope u all don see this lol .. of ya and i haf a new haircut yesterday; it been like ages and i simply cant stand my friggly ugly hair

CYA GUYS AND GALS LATER ! AND TO THOSE WHO ARE SWEET WISH ME HAPPY XMAS LATER LOL !

(leave aside all de troubles; i hope i can again)

LASTLY NO HAPPEN WAT HAPPEN TO NYDB TEAM (o7-o8), I STILL LOVE THIS BUNCH OF PEEPS TO BITS ! =))

2007-12-16T04:13:00.000-08:00

maybe i should stop all my bull-shiting here and face de fact;
IM JUS A DARN IT LOUSY ROWER ! nt even a rower maybe a passenger ! my hopes totally dashed
one word for todae MASTER : SUX
wat happen ? maybe no one realli know
wtf haf we been training so hard for whole 2 month and all to come to a waste
jus when u feel de TEAM is coming up, everything seem to crush u down beyond recognition
U ARE LOUSY; NT JUS LOUSY BUT LOSERS
FUCK ALL THIS MAN !
i love my TEAM ; each and everyone of dem;
i know our results is definitely below expectation; but is tat wat we should be deemed as ?
through my life i heard many harsh things; YES WE MUS FACE THIS HARSH REALITY
but i truly love my team; these words jus come at de wrong time

ok forget it; i shouldnt be typing so much cuz these is useless; maybe many think i talk too much
yes i shouldnt instead; today is seriously a setback for me; im jus a letdown !
after training so many times i was unable to excute de right things at de right time

and deeply apologise to de whole guys team; during de semis today; i shouldnt haf call for de hard 1o right after de starts
cuz de first race without much voice on boat many felt lost;
im realli sry and ah hee say tat was quite a fatal mistake
IM TRULY SORRY . .
while typing all these i realli feel a lot; maybe i should even leave cuz im jus a dragdown to u guys
nth more to say . . .

2007-12-02T00:29:00.000-08:00

i do miss de feeling; yes i cant deny nor hide
but sth is jus stopping me
i do not want nor do i haf de courage
things been different; it has definitely
i dunno when but
wait till im feeling beta den =)) till i can still accept it
and definitely till when i need yOou ..

2007-11-26T20:14:00.000-08:00

PHOTOS ARE KEPT AS MEMORIES, BUT ONLI MEMORIES LINGER IN YOUR MIND . . .
life are fragile, succumb to fate tats life,
i been through de feeling of losing my loved ones and friends, and i truly believe in fate
when de time is up, u jus haf to let it go ;
sound weird but i truly believe in it
ENJOY LIFE WHEN U CAN =))
read about de mishap of de 5 dboaters; its saddening ;training so hard and all to come to an end; but i truly salute them
and de captain of de team MR YEO i tink was one of de pe teacher in nchs, my previous sch and if im nt wrong seeing him row for mountbatten before also; he was lucky but de pressure he felt nw will sure be tremendous; reporters and all de stuff
to de 5 dboaters : R.I.P
life full of ups and downs and we goona face it; STAY STRONG GUYS !

2007-11-23T05:24:00.000-08:00

so wat i haf been doing since de holidays ? PLAY PLAY AND PLAY =))
haven even study a single bit DEAD lol !
but till now holiday was FUN AND MORE FUN x))

so long nevr go club ; yesterday went PLUSH; it was still ok jus tat its too small ? but dere was this fcuk-ing hot gal yesterday even my frenz cant resist haahs ! lol i also never seen such a beautiful gal in club before; dream girl ya LOL !
and seriously im jus nt cut off for jc life and i dunno y am i still staying ? jus wish everything will be over fast ya !
i SERIOUSLY need my freedom ! everything out with my frenz i somehow jus feel indifferent; STUPID JC LIFE and de past life i used to enjoy; its seem to be diminshing; no gals ? dare nt risk in any stupid thing ; im jus afraid everything will be lost jus because of any stupid action i make; cant be tat naive as i was in de past
DECENT LIFE =))

lol i seem to be repeating this like since i step ito jc LOL ! forget it =/

and oh ya i darn long never shop le ! who going shopping jio me pls ! im so out of fashion ! *and i dunno y i feel uneasy in my different dressing*
people look at how u dress im sure of tat ! as in dey judge u on how u dress ; tat kinda unfair rite lol !
so wat but i go jc jus to receive education; i don go dere to look studious or a stupid *humji* guy ; i am who i am =))
but one thing for sure jc ppl jus look and dress more studious-ly LOL ! cuz of de darn hair ! ARGH !

this is wat i call dressing up but its nt me la ! LOL cuz com nt totally ok yet cant upload any photo from my phone; but anyway ya i been cam-whoring of myself lol cuz i seldom get to wear or dress up la ! its been shorts shorts all de while lol !

ok so training; i dunno y but sth bout training is gone; i dunno wats it is but i dont feel any accomplishment or any good feeling after training; maybe it jus apply for me; but even though we know we are training real hard but de feeling is different from de past; maybe over-training or wat i dunno

STH IS simply JUS GONE ! =/

heseemlostinhisownworld; heisgettingoutofhismind; hecanttink; hejuslethisfeelingsswaytillsomeonedecidetograbholdofhim; heknowheneeditbuthedarenotcrossthelineoveragain

2007-11-08T19:31:00.000-08:00

JAY CHOU NEW ALBUM IS LOVES ~!

18th january i coming .. hahas jay chou concert ! and i tink tat day is his bdae too? i been waiting for this day like 3 years ? so i don mind spending de $$ =)) although it make a BIG hole in my pocket =/ but anyway enjoy this song x))

哪里有彩虹告诉我
能不能把我的愿望还给我
为什么天这么安静
所有云都跑到我这里
有没有口罩一个给我
释怀说了太多就成真不了
也许时间是一种解药
也是我现在正服下的毒药
看不见你的笑我怎么睡得着
你的身影这么近我却抱不到
没有地球太阳还是会绕
没有理由我也能自己走
你要离开我知道很简单
你说依赖是我们的阻碍
就算放开那能不能别没收我的爱
当作我最后才明白
有没有口罩一个给我
释怀说了太多就成真不了
也许时间是一种解药
也是我现在正服下的毒药
看不见你的笑我怎么睡得着
你的身影这么近我却抱不到
没有地球太阳还是会绕
没有理由我也能自己走

looking at de crowd; this is de first time i feel myself so much as a loner ..
its been a long time ya it is ..
times realli flies ! when was de yOou who i can find when i needed =/
yOou are lost and gone; leaving me wandering in de lost world alone
but i don mind =)) at least i know how to appreciate when im alone myself
but it will be good if u can come back into my life
i know u will do a good job; wahahas !
images of yOou keep appearing in de crowd;
but when can i ever grab hold of yOou ?

2007-11-04T17:46:00.000-08:00

25TH RIVER REGETTA 2007 ! OUR very own REGETTA O7-O8 BATCH

to start right from the beginning; de training before regetta; to comment actually we wasnt quite focus; de focus is simply gone !
dunno it is because our exam are over pw are over; ppl tend to become more restless i tink LOL ! even for me cuz its like de onli time u can relax a bit rite; hmm but luckily we get our focus back on river regetta day !

FIRST DAY :
2o men crew heats; tough opponent; but we was so so lucky that NUS bang into us but at de same time trying to avoid us bang into all other boat; so left lane 1 and lane 5 as competitors onli ! and we manage to stay compose and gt 1st ! i believe tat was a huge moral boost for a lot of us! but actually is was pure luck; tsk shouldnt realli brag about tat hahas ! gt into semi-final.

20 crew mixed race; de chance for me to row LOL ! was a good set de starts was good maintainence everyone can feel de drive but it was de last charge tat we lag out a bit and didnt manage to get into de semi jus by a difference of 0.3s ! it was good we were leading all de way except de last part; nth to regret on since we did our best !

SUNDAY : 2o men crew
everyone come down smiling yey we made it to de next day feeling great ! but too much of fun i suppose ? ok nvm i also lol ! so 2o men crew semi opponets was considered average compared to other races ! so de race was dam close ! gt a 3rd but de diff was dam close; nvm we still made it to de minor finals based on timing and we definitely are in de top 1o position ! everyone also gt a boost in their moral ! psyching up for de last race of our batch ! learn from de mistakes we made in every races; im sure it help !

last race for regetta ! everyone knew wat to do and to do their best ! nth much to be said ! from de drummer seat when i look at all u guys it is de first time realli de first time u all gave me de ' we goona win it ! gear up for every stroke !' yes tats de nan chu spirit ! nth much to sae bout tat race set; it was near to perfect even mr lee said so ; its rare tat he sae its good rite hahas ! though we still lost but it all because of our lane la Zz ! nvm it was a good race set everyone knew tat ! came off de boat with joy =))
PS : sry for tat sudden short mst on de boat lol ! but it help u all rite hahs ! and yes we will soar as a TEAM !

and ty all de seniors for came down though u all still haf a lvls ! we juniors appreciate a lot ! its de things u all sae tat wake us up ! yes we cant rely on u all everytime but we appreciate de help u all gave !

as for me i realli goona train much more; my muscles jus don seem to wanna grow big argh ! stupid ! but we goona TRAI N TRAIN TRAIN ! hope it pay off ! remember our aim : a div here we come !

2007-11-03T06:17:00.000-07:00

hmm its dam long since i last blog ! sorie luh lol .. but very happi my counter still jumping ok will blog more often ! LOL
so wat happen in my life ! let me think i sort of kena mental-block suddenly
let me recap after getting my happy most improved student award i bought a PSP to play LOL ! and i tink i play too much hahas !
den dere was de final step for pw which is op ; first time my group was so cooperative out of all de stuff like wr or other things ! and im glad tat we ended pw with a good one; de point i trying to sae is tat sometimes dunno y human need to take so long den dey can work well tgther and enjoy de times being tgther ! hahs ! anyway NO MORE PW ! =))
and this period of time i tink i realli enjoy myself ! went out with my frenz most of de time ! dota time with db ppl ! ITS WAS BASICALLY FUN !
but i know i goona study soon ! OH YA and GOOD LUCK TO ALL SENIORS WHO ARE HAVING THEIR A LVLs NOW !
so tats about all anyway u all see me quite often so nth much to sae LOL !~

2007-10-23T06:13:00.000-07:00

NUMBER 1 MOST IMPROVED STUDENT IN NYJC =))
omgosh this seem to be de best achievement i ever haf in my studies man ! seem more like a dream LOL ! was freaking shock when my name was announce but it was LOVEs x))
yey ! proud of myself ! LOL though my result wasnt tat good afterall but de great improvements im already happy about tat ..
so ya i said before that i work for myself and nobody else .. but i gotta admit i work so hard this time for NYDB ! it may sound funny but its true
remember de goal when we had after mid-year; all to be promoted up and no one is to be left behind ! at de point i was like CMI la im dead ! im sure most ppl feel tat way too; but im proud to sae that we make it now !
and im proud of de guys team that 3 of us make it to de best improvement and alvin a straight 3 As ; but we had to face a fact dere still one of our teammate retaining .. but pls don be disheartenend; everyone in NYDB stand up for u !

since we can do so well in our result, im sure we can do tat in our races too ! RIVER REGETTA next sat and sun ! PREPARED ? im hope everyone do !
not much time left ! lets do it one more time; like how we do it all de time ! NO DISAPPOINTMENT BUT ONLY GLORY !
here we come '

2007-10-16T05:14:00.000-07:00

FREAKING WR IS FINALLY OVER ! in case some dunno it mean written report opps no its just a waste of resources !
sleepless nite spent on it ! pimples seem to be popping out and my 'panda' eyes seem to be showing out ! ARGH ! my good complexion =/
de wr i feel was just ok ! but at least its over shant tink about it anymore ! counting down to de days when sch is over and NYDB will just train train train !
yeah and shop shop shop ! my $$ dunno y so fast run out ! LOL ! more things to get =))
and my bros its seriously spending time with u guys ! and my 'girlfriends' too ! haahs
NYDB yeah kind to tink of it ! it realli de life of de 24 guys and 19 gals in this team ! 43 of us will make miracle clear all barrier and soar as a TEAM !
Masters this sun and its realli kinda fast ! but we know we will make it good ! training 2morrow and let make it a good one ! we know we can =))

time for some 'cam-whoring' at home hahas ..
jus trying out some clothes =))

goona get much more clothes den this ! cardigan argh argh ! getting psp this week i guess yey fun ! LOL

tats all ! take care all x))
enjoy this song its awesome !

"Your Guardian Angel"

When I see your smile
Tears run down my face I can't replace
And now that I'm strong I have figured out
How this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul
And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one
I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven
It's okay. It's okay. It's okay.
Seasons are changing
And waves are crashing
And stars are falling all for us
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter
I can show you I'll be the one
I will never let you fall (let you fall)
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all (through it all)
Even if saving you sends me to heaven
Cuz you're my, you're my, my, my true love, my whole heart
Please don't throw that away
Cuz I'm here for you
Please don't walk away and Please tell me you'll stay woah, stay woah
Use me as you will
Pull my strings just for a thrill
And I know I'll be okay
Though my skies are turning gray
I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven[to fade]

2007-10-13T23:15:00.000-07:00

YEY ! PROMOTED ! WOHOO =))
been realli busi after de day releasing of results .. haf been going home jus for sleeping lol ! spent time for db , bros , frenz =))
LOVES ! actually i quite jus scraped through my promo .. all was quite expected i believe except math ! gRR ! i work de most for it la ..
ok so
GP : E
MATH : D =((
GEO : C
PHYSICS : B =))
ECON : U sian 39 marks
all grades expect A and S lol ! still ok ba promote can liao .. hahas ! NO MORE other options people ! gotta pia all de way for a lvls and let it all come to an end !
CMON quick quick ! pw nt going realli well .. guess it will jus turn out bad but cant realli do much about it ! deadline next tues =/
super shag after 3 days of continuous rowing ! going to sleep now ! bb

y do some ppl do nt understand wat u are trying to drive at or wat u are trying to show ! are dey plain idiot or wat !
human feelings is jus a stupid thing ! jus let it be over and done with !

2007-10-09T08:12:00.000-07:00

I SO LOVES MY BROS AND FRENZ !
GOONA SPEND EVERYDAY WITH U GUYS WHENEVER I CAN !
BUT FOR NOW ITS TIME FOR ME TO SLEEP !
TOO MANY ACTIVITIES .. NO TIME TO BE WRITTEN BUT BE KEPT AS LOVELY MEMORIES =))
OH ya single is great ! LOL !

2007-10-07T18:53:00.000-07:00

100th post ! yey and im finally back ..
this few days were freaking busi for me ..
fri hmm where did i go ? ok i went to shop for clothes but fuck it all de thing s i wanna buy was either sold out or none was simply nice ! gRr
maybe i'll jus get de cardigan from four skin .. but any1 who noe where can buy nice cardigans tell me asap =)) ty !
and hmm i saw de j2 db gals team ! LOL i dunno y evertime saw kang and jean i will be wearing de same shirt lol .. u all attrated to my shirt izzit hahas ..
so i went back ta sleep at around 11 and wake up next day at 5 plus for db !
it been a long time man ! many of us haf been waiting for this day but all of us also got rusty .. hahas
2 weeks more to Master - 1 more months to river regetta .. lets put in all we can x))

sat - db den off to sentosa ! went with my sec frenz and i haf ta sae tat day de scenery was awesome LOL ! so dere was much fun and we left around 7 ? ok de pics i will put some other days .. den i went to celebrate jocelyn bdae .. hahas happi bdae ! went ta eat chat chat and it was much fun compared to de studying i haf for de last 2 months ! oh ya since i talk about studies i gotta comment sth about it ! STUDIES SUX ! cuz it lead to other negative externalities .. FREAK now my ppool sux like hell , cs dota all freaking bad , and my all-time favourite bbal at de arcade ! NOW ITS ALL HORRIBLE ! and paiseh my frenz lol i know i lose my temper when i was playing tat bbal thingy tat day hahas .. hope i didnt injure any of u guys lol .. STUPID STUDIES ARGH ! FUCK DEM OFF !

sun - db in de morning , lan with db guys in de afternoon and i saw resident evil 3 next .. tat show was nt bad i mus sae ; i didnt sleep much although i was darn tired so its nice ba .. hahas 'opps but i slept a while at de start' den all brothers went to eat at kfc .. but tat lame mat did stupid things and de gal beside us realli went off ! LOL let me illustrate

sk went to ask for de table beside cuz de gals wasnt using but we still didnt haf enough seat LOL ! 11 of us i tink .. den mat started singing you're beautiful 'pause' its true knn and he sing dam loud ! and de gals dunno y like see us too pia kia like tat keep saying sorry .. Zz are we tat scary ? nt even 1 min dey left liao didnt even noe dey gt finsih their food a nt LOL .. PRO MAT

went home around 7pm liao .. sleep liao of course eveyday less den 5 hours of sleep ! i slept till next morning and i was realli sick .. so i didnt went to sch now ! but so sorry to my pw group cuz we suppose to meet todae ! but im reali nt feeling well .. nt enough sleep i guess but all de fun was worthwhile =))

2007-10-02T10:14:00.000-07:00

argh FREAK ! IM GOONA SHOP AS SOON AS EVERYTHING IS OVER !!
saw too many nice items online .. jus wanna grab dem all ! obsessed with lots of things ! black and grey stripped cardigan ! stussy world tee ! lee denim slim jeans ( all de freaking nice denim slim or skinny jeans ) and imported tees ! many many more ! WANNA GET DEM ALL =))
ok it a mus for me to shop straight after promos ! yey !
who want go shop tell me ! 24/7 hours ! =))
and im free im goona open an online shop ! support kkay ! sure sell gud stuff de ! stay tuned x))
nt going sae any more le .. goona look at more clothings !

2007-09-29T05:21:00.001-07:00

dunno suddenly why pretty EMO now !
this post is jus delicated to myself ! so don peep hahas .. not for people below 8o years old

where did all de hug s went to ?
de kisses tat use to belong to me ..
all de sweet-talking though it was childish; but i actually yearn for it right now ..
where was all de memories tat people used to gave to mi ..
where are those chances which jus flew away ?
where is the moment when de timing felt jus right
smooching;luster;pleasure; though these were considered undesirable in de eyes of elderly
but i knew den it felt jus right ..
where haf all these gone ?
rip de freedom off me !
i miss all the happy moments i used to spend with all you people ..
when can i ever get it back !
maybe this days tat i may get it back = IMPOSSIBLE

do anyone out dere still care ? =/
he cant handle any much more .. putting on fake smiles;laughter;attitude
he tried his best to change for de beta which most ppl want him to ..
he considered tat he haf done it
will anyone accept his back;adding joy back to his life
or he will rather be de one in de past ..
but he know he was being selfish; he never care much for his gals in de past
he cherish nth; he jus let everyone past him;holding on to none
known for a bastard; but he know hes nt now
he never want to get back to de bad person he was before; but anyone know ?
he cherish every moment of his life
getting more emotional as de days past by ..
he reach out his hand waiting for someone to let him hold tight in his arms ..
he jus yearn for LOVE
a LOVE which is complete and perfect =))
he knew he gotta wait and someday he will get a taste of it
darling , how i wish i can jus call it once more ..

promo s jus isnt going too well .. idoubt i will be able to make it; but even if i can, i tink i haf jus lost everything else
but jus give me a ray of hope; let me cross this obstacle pls !
2 h2 1 h1 i hope it can be achieve .. GP MATH AND GEO ! i count on u 3 ! PASS PASS PASS !
argh FUCK ! pls make it; never felt so desperate before =/
CMON; goona be strong ! though my econ flunk badly

2007-09-24T05:12:00.000-07:00

hahas update on promos ! wohoo
1st paper : GENERAL PAPER
WISH : jus a pass =)) hahas
should be able to pass (i hope) ..
de compo ques on poverty i hope i wont go out of de ques den should be ok ba .. tats all math 2morrow !

so math was todae ! de subject i pin my most hope on .. but too bad de paper was above expectation (plus all my stupid careless mistakes)
dere goes my good grade for this subject but a pass should be ok i tink .. hahas
WISH : a C =))
if there should be a miracle maybe a B but dont give me a E ! LOL ! next paper econ on thur .. nt pinning much hope on tat

ok after a day rest todae was econs ! since i never realli study for market failure or jus briefly read through so ya i did on elasticity and market structure .. econs i wont sae unexpected or wat cuz its still de same thing jus tat de phrasing is different .. cant guage de result cuz u wont noe wat dey expect ;but jus hope after more essays done it will be beta den mid-year ! tats all !
FUCK FAIL ! lot of errors sure a gone case ! sian ! fuck it ! don give me a dam low mark man !
2morrow geo yey ! left 1 h2 and 1 h1 subject left ! CMON im counting to de day it will end ..

physical geo was ok ba .. should be a pass (beside geo cant realli fail rite)
so i wish for a C =)) jus find out slight errors here and dere so cant get very gud results le ba ..

promos aint turning out promising enough .. i guess it may jus be de end .. no h1 pass im goona get out of this !

so todae was physics ! LOVES ! lol at least de things i studied came out .. but de freaking mcq was darn tricky
whether i pass or nt i tink it depend hugely on de mcq ! CMON yey pass it and i no need to worry so much =))
4 more days to human geo ! till den hurray and its playing time x))

2007-09-23T04:28:00.000-07:00

YEAH guys ! PROMO start 2morrow !

i have no idea why im so excited bout it .. but i rather it end earli and we can all go back to our dragon-boating =))
all of us haf work real hard so lets jus pray that our effort paid off !
CMON ready for last charge ! yeah its start 12 hour later .. hahas
omg im going bonkers LOL !

JIA YOU ALL ! BEST OF LUCKS !
LETS ALL PROMOTE ! HURRAY ! =))

2007-09-19T06:50:00.000-07:00

y should i be enduring all these shit ! i realli dunno y ..
life been so different ! argh and i become so naggy ranting about all these shit all days long ..
y should i ! enduring with ppl 'hao lian' about their competence !
enduring shit at wat ppl blabble about ! FUCK ALL THIS !
if it was in de past ! i wasnt be enduring all these ! my fist will just fly
TOLERANCE IS SIMPLY BULLSHIT !
i given up hope in studies ..
be it i retain or promote i don mind about it anymore ! as long as i did my best !
i nt going to harbour over it anymore !
if i retain - no more JC life .. im going ta poly definitely - decision made
im jus nt cut out for JC life !
tats all i can sae ..
it jus taken away all my freedom !

2007-09-18T07:38:00.000-07:00

SOUL - SEARCHING
y are kids nowadays so result-orientated ! especially in jcs ! education failure ! and its seem ta influence mi too ! NONONO !
i work for myself not for any other things .. i dont like to compare cuz i jus compete with myself ..
oblivious to wat other sae .. i am who i am !
escaping from changes - wat will be de story from now on ?

i never thought i need u but now i do ..

2007-09-15T09:52:00.000-07:00

yeah ! this is me !

2007-09-15T03:21:00.000-07:00

"When You're Gone"
I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie is made up on your side
When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now
When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok
I miss you
I've never felt this way before
Everything that I do reminds me of you
And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor
And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do
When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now
We were made for each other
Out here foreverI know we were, yeah
All I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I'd do, I'd give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me, yeah

2007-09-12T07:45:00.000-07:00

PROMOS COMING REAL SOON ! ~~

ARGH ! i can feel de pressure now .. less den 1o days left ! it will determine whether i'll retain or promote ! and apparently i don wish to retain at all after de efforts i put in .. but if i still didnt make it i tink i will look for alternatives =/

i did a guage and i like nid ta basically pass all in promos to promote ! cuz i didnt did well in mid-year (obviously) but luckily my ca help a bit .. but still all at border line so all depends on de promos ! around 42 to pass for math , 46 to pass for my h1 , and around 45 for econs ! = i jus gotta pass all ! argh fuck ! i hope tat my math and geo will pass at least 2 for h2 .. and for de h1 it all depend on luck hahas ..

CMON ! i can feel a little out of time but still much beta den mid-year hahas but tats nt sth to be proud of LOL ! math dere still prob here and there geo left to memorise tink im able to understand all liao .. econs gotta pray hard as in i can tackle de ques correctly .. and finally h1 physics pls grant mi tyco skill in mcq .. its a great weightage i tink 4o % ? so pls ! LOL !

im coming for j2 man ! no retaining ! =/ no more talks , action now ..

2007-09-08T20:41:00.000-07:00

study ! oh shit i doubt i studied much for this holiday ! don tell mi im dead =/
keep going from places to places .. studying shopping chatting and obviously playing =))
and finally gt de time ta get sth yesterday though we went out darn late ..
gt a skinny but dere lots more tat i wanna buy ! freaking more ! CMON let sch end soon its been so long since i went out to see de world and shop .. i tink im lagging way behind fashion nowadays .. stupid JC life LOL

wishlist
- more skinnys obviously
- nice cardigan prefer strips one ( and i been tinking of it darn long already )
- studded belt ( hopefully it fit my waist )
- strip polo tees
- nice plain tees
- and a nice bag which i wanna find but i cant
- and tat ripcurl wallet ( i shall tell u all de story later )
dere more la .. jus nw for de time-being =))

ya about tat ripcurl wallet - its kinda nice and class cuz dere no zip no anything .. and when i want ta buy rite ! de salesperson took darn long and i also dunno wat dey doing and den i noe dey finding for de barcode .. i thought ok nvm i wait .. and FUCK dey sae can u choose another design -_-" after dey cant find it ! i was like can u jus FUCK OFF ! Zz isnt items put in shop suppose to be puchase-able .. i can onli sae tat im SUAY ! but i will still look for it ..

tats all next 1 month i tink i will be blogging less serious exam period ! its either i promote or dead ! ok wish mi gud lucks man ! i noe i nid lots of dem =)) take care all !

2007-09-07T04:40:00.000-07:00

argh ! it seems to take ages for my eyes to heal ! and im realli afraid it will spread around to other ppl and im like de 'culprit' .. and im still going out =/
hmm so went for econ in de morning .. nth much jus de same old MARKET FAILURE .. econ i plan nt ta focus so much on it cuz evenn study alot also de hardest ta pass hahas .. might as well jus study sufficient - and tats de end and jus hope for a PASS =))

ya and we went mind cafe yesterday to celebrate shandie bdae ! happi bdae ! and
we end up like nt playing much but chatting around creating noises LOL .. and of cos photo -taking =)) OMGOSH i jus realised i so like ta take photos nowadays man ! who want take with me can tell mi wahahas ..
and we play sth like vote for ppl who matches de type of personality based on questions .. hahas and i remember one ques who haf de most girlfriend/boyfriend LOL ! should ask stranger go play cuz all noe liao nt fun .. and i onli haf 1 before ok and tats MI =)) i loves myself !
and one ques for everyone to ponder .. if you were to go around the world for 80 days who would yOou bring along .. hmm *winks*

and i didnt go velvet dragon ! maybe a pity but its nt ! hahas at least we went kbox at nite till it closed wohoo ! tats was fun ! but actually didnt go cuz of my stupid eyes and crowded area dont seem an attraction for mi anymore ! NO LUST ! hahas
ya kbox ! de place i loves ta go =)) and ya like wat u all sae im always de first one to start it going .. hahas
first song - bei ji xing de yan lie if u all gt watch wei siao pasta den u will understand hahas x))
and this previous song too by lin jj and lots more la .. but basically its was SUPER DUPER FUN !! reach home around 4am ? LOL
isnt tat like de time clubbing ends ? but its definitely more fun ..

so near yet so far
it melts - watever u do
reappear - how do i accept
de smiles laughter =)) - yes i do
will i be back fine ?

brothers and frenz are definitely more impt to mi den any gals on earth .. you guys noe tat

aniwae its nt a bad thing being de ANGELBEARX ! yeah tats who i am !
someone who can bring u guys smiles and laughter =))

- bei ji xing de yan lei

2007-09-05T05:52:00.000-07:00

i do not noe y im still ranting bout my past .. y cant i jus seem to settle down though i wish to ?
y i cant i jus accept de way people look at mi nw - an innocent small kid who can like be push over by others
i noe i can never be de same as i was in de past ; people do change ..
but i wish to go back to de past - where my life wasnt as lifeless as nw ! its should be exciting as it used to be ..
i dunn even noe i can get past de 2 years or even 3 years in JC ..
lots of sacrifices haf already been made ..
it goes on till its neven ending !

tiny puny wheeny me =/
argh FUCK FUCK FUCK !!
i also dunno wat i want or jus wat im trying to prove !
1oo % guai kia ..
de way people look at mi haf change !
bye to de old mi .. things haf change times realli haf change
FACE DE REALITY !
WAKE UP ! ARGH !

2007-09-04T19:46:00.000-07:00

LOL i saw this 'lame' thing done by gary ! hahas nt lame la but funni .. OMGOSH u all should go and take a look at elvis one its more kp so i shant post ..
i want to make it big but it will get blur, if aany it expert can help mi tell mi pls LOL !

and my eyes aint getting any beta ! sian ! hope i can get back ta sch 2morrow ! havent been studdying much due ta de stupid eyes .. worried bout promos liao onli cover like 1 1/2 subject , gotta mug much harder ! gud luck and jia yous all !

WAIT WAIT WAIT ! i saw this pic also .. OMGOSH though its so long ago but its nice la ! and i tink i taken lots of photos which ppl never send mi gRr !
if u all still haf send it to mi hahas ..

2007-09-02T22:14:00.000-07:00

IM SICK =(
i gt like nw 2 swollen red eyes nw ! jus went ta see doc and gt a 4 days mc Zz .. and i don tink i can use com for long hahas
jus some random things again ..
ALWAYS NOE WAT U ARE DOING !
hmm ya jus realise some guys who are jus as childish as i used to be in de past ! cant laugh at dem cuz i been through it before hahas ..
and HANDLE "things" PROPERLY .. or u jus find urself failing time after another and tat makes u a complete FAILURE !
WATEVER U DO MAKE DE BEST OUT OF IT !
if u choose to study , make sure u get ta de top and nt be a slacker idling time away and failing all subjects
want to be a pia kia , be someone dua pia and who ppl respect ..
dun project de fucking image tat u are a pia kia when u are jus hum ! ya understand ?
COUNT ON URSELF AND DON ALWAYS COUNT ON OTHERS ! its useless

maybe some of this i gotta tell myself too !
since i choose to study i shouldnt be failing like nobody business and in de end a FAILURE ..
no matteer wat path we choose , we should try to achieve de best =/ and no path is bad jus tat how u see it ..
believe in urself ! and u will succeed eventually ..

and i heard tat holy innocent guy who gt knocked by de 27 ..
before his unfortunate day he gt blog sth bout life short and we should cherish it ..
its realli a pity for him but wat we can learn is life is truly short !
make full use of every moment ! LIVE LIFE TO DE FULLEST =))
and cherish ur loved ones x))
till nw this is de only thing tat i regretted ~ ..

2007-09-01T21:05:00.000-07:00

大男人小女孩
不是我的错
我们都听过
完美的时候要更多
找这时候说的太多
有时候的我
只想和你一样沉默
不想单单罗罗嗦嗦
水也灭不掉的火
也许大男人真的很男人
少了点风度还是不承认
有时候错的并不知道错的不想借口只是直接一天说
有时候女孩没那么小孩
心里的无奈也需要点关怀
遗憾的遗留变成勉强了
怎么能重新再来

this song sound EMO but i'll just listen to it for de time being ..

searching for u , u never seem to appear
jus when i was about to give up hope , u appeared right in front of mi showing mi yOur lovely smile
everything seems wonderful and i can feel de warmth yOou gave to mi
but de presense of love seem gone
maybe its jus hard to start everything over again
isnt it ?
so many of yOou appear in my life
but none seem ever-lasting
where is de yOou who will stay by mi all these times
i don feel lost nw but instead i feel happi =))
where will we intercept ?
when will yOou haf de courage ?
make no decision till yOou surface back to my life ..

aniwae jus sth random and funni
i saw this from de shirt of my sis :
5 things tigger loves
-bounching
-having fun !
-best friends
-picnics in 100 acre woods
-bother-free days
how i wish my life can be so care-free too and i can jus nt tink of anything for my remaining days ..
y mus dere de presense of so many complicated things ..
its hard to juggle and handle about ..
i shall jus treat everything easi =))
<3>

2007-09-01T20:03:00.000-07:00

LOVESS all u frenz out dere ! ya even though i goona mug realli hard for my promos i still will take out some time with u guys i promise !

actually its quite a blessing i haf so many frenz out dere who still havent forget mi i presume .. hahas

ya so many of memories float through my mind tinking bout each and everyone of u ! de fun timess de rebellious stage till we now realise wat actually is life .. kinda cool ya at least we gone through so much in a period of 17 years !

maybe some photos hahs ..

yey ! ex class 2h tat seem like 3 years ago but we will never change =))

and for nw some random stuff since i gt time nw ta upload some photos from my phone =))

my hair jus before coming into jc

before having de fucking haircut and ta da nw u all can see how short it is but i wont post any photo about it LOL ..

hahas and some lovely pics which was drawn in de gym i presume LOL

hahas elvis i dun haf de one u draw in de gym .. hahas i bet tat was beta LOL ! and don sae tat this is gay hahas

so i still haf much fun this few days ya ! but about de mugging part i shall sae it de next time ! for nw its fun fun fun !

anymore fun do invite mi ! =)) tats all

2007-08-31T18:01:00.000-07:00

yey went back ta nchs yesterday ! ok saw nt many teachers cuz many left but most of it was my frenz ! i remember de past how defiance i was in class hahas .. table kana throw out fighting make teacher cry all cool ! LOL ok but main thing at least part of our class was back and tat picture realli seem like a family gathering .. when i get de pic i will post it =))

even though each of us lead different lives nw but im sure we wont forget each other ! especially de 5 bros im sure we can count on each other when anything happen ! sound so EMO lol ! maybe dere wasnt anything gud in my past i can mention maybe bringing fun and laughter to ta class hahas =))
de feeling of having fun seem so stress-less and relax .. no harbouring about studies or wat so ever ! de feeling waas great how i wish everything can jus remain de same and i jus do de things tat i like ..

like wat i said in different environment i cant use de same method ta adapt or im sure i cant survive .. hahas like wat last time we say buay song pia yi pia dao ke si la ! i doubt i can use this phrase anymore hahas bo yong liao .. but i still like those times la exciting rite ! LOL nw 1 punch im out liao hahas .. ok wont disgress into tat =/

in jus 1 small tiny places i can see lots of ppl i remember ..
i cant be doing wat i have done in de past .. i noe i play as de bad guy back den
but nw dere too much things ta handle den ta tink of these things ..
its impossible for mi ta make a decision nw ..
maybe 1 or 2 years later ~ =/

and to some of my bros out dere .. pai seh ji ku wei buay gan cor hor .. bei lang ai cui da ji ni ma si lan lan !
unless u plan in to give it all out .. or else don do anything
ji zhun wo lang buay sai luan luan lai liao
teng bai si ma ta chu jiu sua liao ji zhun si jail hor !
i can sae i cant lose so much nw compared to de past .. things will change de
dere will be a downfall to everything .. cherish everyone tat u haf !

i can play lots of role but don let me be de bad guy tat come down haunting on u .. i bet u wont like it either

TC ALL !

2007-08-30T04:32:00.000-07:00

I MISS ALL U FRENZ OUT DERE !

maybe coming ta JC was a wrong decision afterall ! i don realli noe .. coming in here i kinda lost de life i use to haf !
it realli makes me pondering whether de life im leading nw is beta ?
but one thing studying seem so meaningless ! but u noe u jus gotta do it ! argh FUCK IT !
im realli nt tat kind of people who cut out to mug ! i still remember de first reaction everyone give mi when i came to JC was like OMG how come he come to JC ! it was like a shock to others including mi .. ya db was de thing to let mi on but nw when studies set in , i feel so lost !

i seem to haf lose contact with all u frenz ! NO MORE POOL CLUBBING ALL SORT OF fucking things ! i didnt even noe how i manage ! its like a totally big change .. is it for de beta or for de worse ? haish
dere simply no extra time for mi ta mit up with u guys ! every moment seem so limited ! but seriously i wish ta spend more times with all of u ..
but its hard ! maybe its just time for mi ta change de kind of life im leading ! but who i am will never be change !
and ya i still hate fucking guai lan ppl nt to those tat joke with mi ( u all noe who u are ) but those realli guai lan ppl ! didnt noe dere de presense of dem in JC but i remember last time i like 'playing' with this kind of ppl ! hahas
but always one thing linger in my mind before i do sth silly ! one punch i give i definitely be out and i will be like wasting my time for simply a stupid bunch of ppl ! i cant be tat implusive anymore ! its hard but i'll try .. and ya some of dem seem like realli 'innocent' kid .. some of de things dey exaggerate or hao lian realli can make u laugh ! cuz dey don even noe wat happening in de outside world but claim to be somewat 'pia kia?' hahas sometimes its jus too funni !

ok y am i still tinking ! its coming ta de end of de year already ! CMON db will let me survive this 2 years and all u db mates out dere !
and ya i believe tat i can ! =))

2007-08-29T07:36:00.000-07:00

short hair short hair short hair short hair short hair short hair short hair short hair short hair short hair short hair short hair short hair !!
argh short hair realli tat dam ugly meh ?! Zz ok i noe its ugly fugly ! quick grow grow grow ~!
and im fucking going back ta nchs on fri ! terrible image LOL !
don care liao ! aniwae its nt much of use ! hahas
nt going ta blog tat often liao maybe jus on random things .. if nt ppl also sian liao ..
for nw its jus study study study ! Zz

2007-08-24T05:03:00.000-07:00

hmm ok quite long never come online le ! was mugging i tink ? but result doesnt appear to be veri gud afterall .. it was like from all U to 2 S now .. sian ! it doesnt prove to be much beta ! BUT i will jus try to get promoted de ! =))
ya and basically i jus feel JC life to be totally different ! STUDIES ya definitely much harder ! but people i met it seem so different .. in jc dere are so many different personalties u can find in ppl ! u jus dunno how their mind will work or how dey tink ! y will ppl get so annoyed by small little things or appear to be nt even like a human ? cant we jus accept things more openly ? but one thing i mus sae ! ppl here definitely tink much more and differently ! maybe nt like some chao ah beng buay song shou pia tat kind ..
but of course dere are ppl tat are nice too ! LIKE OUR NYJC DB TEAM X)) suffering tgther , studying tgther and of course playing tgther =))

like from wat i see wat one of de seniors wrote : in the end its nt de medals u get tat u will cherish but de 2 years with ur TEAM tat we all fight for ! and jus curious bout sth .. was our last cheer last time YAOZAI YAOYIN NANCHU, NANCHU LONGZHOU SHENGLI ! this seem much more zai and beta la ! hahas
ya nth much already later ppl sae will read till sian ! hahas

its still hard to be enduring everything alone
sometimes its still gud to haf a partner afterall ..

2007-08-19T07:12:00.000-07:00

WELL DONE GUYS !!

this is defintely a good start for our career ! nw we noe where we stand ! 2nd for plate final ! its quite a gud result aniwae though we didnt met our goals but close to it ya .. at least we manage to clock 1 race set at a timing below 2.20 tats gud ! nth much haf to be said before or after de race ! everyone noe wat to do and we fight together till de end as a TEAM !

during de last set at de plate final i realli feel like nearly breaking down during maintainence .. a few strokes was bad .. but no matter how lethargic i was .. tinking bout u guys dere is simply no way i will give up ! u guys seriously ROX ! deeep from within my heart : to most of us de ppl in de TEAM is why we push for ! we don realli push for de results but for de TEAM .. as wat solo said before de race it will be de last race or even water session before Promos .. tinking bout tat its realli hard ta imagine ! we guys haf been seeing each other for like less den 24 hrs each day or sometimes even less den 12 hours ! de friendship , teamwork we bonded will nt be put to waste ! todae we haf proven ourself ! though dere was more we can achieve but everyone felt awesome happi ! =))
and after de first race i realli felt darn it happi la ! cuz all my previous race i row was last and dere will never be a last anymore !
believe in ourself believe in de TEAM !

and remember even though dere no training train up urself ya and i gt lot of strength training to do to build myself up .. gotta push in both studies and individual strength .. ty guys for de race todae ! im sure everyone haf given de hell out of it !

LETS ROCK AND ROW !!

2007-08-17T23:34:00.000-07:00

BREAK IT OR WIN IT !
WAT WILL BE DE ANS ?

2007-08-17T07:13:00.000-07:00

studies studies studies ! i tink im slowly catching up already .. NO MORE Us man ! NO WAY ! mugger works =))

hmm like wat solo sae maybe tat day i realli like kena interupted dunno how many times LOL but i didnt even noe realli wat im toking hahas!
but de point is jus clear ! WE NEED EVERY1 TO BE CLEAR OF DE GOALS ! every1 seem scattered here and there now .. seem to be no one to guide us far enough or to focus on de things we should do .. but only 1 training left ! watever de result is as long as we give our best its enough ! and like wat elvis sae we should push smart and hard ! correct our strokes first before pushing if not no matter how hard we are pushing it would be futile .. im correcting mine too .. so lets jus wish for de best !

and elvis i noe maybe my post is like always de same and maybe it jus useless and im like jus ranting .. but wat i can wish for is de best out of de TEAM ! all of us belong in it so watever we can do, we should jus help all our teammates to greater heights !
ROCK AND ROW GUYS !

2007-08-15T07:17:00.000-07:00

nt attempting ta nag here .. but well its been so long i talk bout db hahas !

ok MASTERs this sun 19o8o7 ! i noe recently lot of us mindset are wrong, nt as commited compared to de past ! ya ok maybe i was one of dem too ..
im nt sure if studies was de main thing but u jus cant leave so much time for it nw ! ok for tat im sry ..

but this sun competition race ! phrase it this way : how many times would we have the chance to row as NYJC dragonboater in our db career ?.. even though dere are quite a few races but it isnt a lot too rite .. so we should cherish all ya ? i noe im in no position to sae much cuz my rowing sux strength sux but hmm jus being realistic ! compared ta de seniors i tink our training hasnt been tat tough and most of us seem to be taking advantage of tat or wat i dunno .. at de very most we should jus give all out this sun ! don let mistakes during de fest repeat itself again ! it was an embarrasement im sure u all dont want tat to happen again ! i noe dere nth much we can do nw with jus 1 training left ! but i believe tat once we break our mental barrier it can work miracles ; but first get de mindset rite !

jus a comment todae when yiyang sae sth , i can see most of us nt as 'focus' as before; i dunno wat de exact word to use .. but it jus feel different ! remember in de past when ppl commented sth everyone will 'feel' for it .. but nw its all gone .. im nt sure if u guys feel it !
make an effort to put in jus tat bit more for de TEAM ! all of us left are both physically and mentally strong ! NO ONE LEFT IS WEAK ! believe in de TEAM ! after so much we gone through to cope with our studies i tink its time to give it all we haf for MASTERS .. no matter wat de results are at least we did our best ! but try to reach our goals coming in TOP 10 ! its possible

set aside all de differences ! PSYCH urself up ! after this we haf de hell lot of time studying ! but for nw give it all ! i noe everyone is doing de best trying to cope with both studies and db ! ya tats gud but for this sun lets try ta aim for gud result nt jus in studies but in db too !
tats all i can sae ! all is left within each and eveyone of us ! i believe this sun our morale will be high and we will jus crush anyone in our way !
ITS ALL IN THE MIND ! JIAYOU

2007-08-13T07:19:00.000-07:00

LOST

FUCK all the tons of homework
FUCK the stress i haf that i may land up retaining ! (i don want this to happen)
FUCK this hectic life which is torturing the hell of me
FUCK all this feelings which im encountering now
FUCK all the failures but not happiness
FUCK those hyprocrite and CB kia
FUCK people who anyhow jump to conclusion
FUCK those who are trying to control me
FUCK those who jus demoralise me when im jus trying to work hard
FUCK all these 'muggerish'
FUCK all these displeasures im having
FUCK the past

sometimes i wonder y i am doing this ! i gt no ans for it ! it jus all seem weird
even im dunno wat im feeling nw ! wat im trying to achieve or getting out of anything !
ok even stupid 'love' feelings im nt able to get it straight ! argh FUCK it man ! who gives a dam !
ya maybe i should sae this nw ! i don mind being 'single' though its true tat dere may be feelings here and there ..
but i believe wat will happen will eventually happen .. even miracles
i jus need freedom ! onli doing things tat i like ! ya tats wat i am ! so if u are nt happi jus SCRAM !
i dunno y i am pouring my displeasures nw but tats wat im feeling nw ! get it !

ya watched secret de second time ! ty ger pei mi go watch =)) and i realise i sleep too much last time Zz
so i manage nt ta sleep this time ! ok its seem more touching nw ..

ni heng xi guan comg bei hou xia ren wo .. ying wei wo xi huan ni de bei ying
neng yu jian ni yi jing shi bu ke shi yi le <3

2007-08-09T22:47:00.000-07:00

sparks sparks sparks ~! LOL ! how in love dey were ~

ENVY ! ENVY ! ENVY ! but nw seldom ppl ride on bicycles to sch or wat do we ? LOL

lovely - walking tgther side by side enjoying every moments tat dey share and de sweet smile =)

braving de rain tgther - i love this CMON rain rain rain ! LOL usually sparks will occur at this very moment

冷咖啡离开了杯垫
我忍住的情绪在很后面
拼命想挽回的从前
在我脸上依旧清晰可见
最美的不是下雨天
是曾与你躲过雨的屋檐
回忆的画面
在荡着秋千梦开始不甜
你说把爱渐渐放下会走更远
又何必去改变已错过的时间
你用你的指尖阻止我说再见
想象你在身边在完全失去之前
你说把爱渐渐放下会走更远
或许命运的签只让我们遇见
只让我们相恋
这一季的秋天
飘落后才发现这幸福的碎片
要我怎么捡
冷咖啡离开了杯垫
我忍住的情绪在很后面
拼命想挽回的从前
在我脸上依旧清晰可见
最美的不是下雨天
是曾与你躲过雨的屋檐 Woo~
回忆的画面
在荡着秋千梦开始不甜
你说把爱渐渐放下会走更远
又何必去改变已错过的时间
你用你的指尖阻止我说再见
想象你在身边在完全失去之前
你说把爱渐渐放下会走更远
或许命运的签只让我们会遇见
只让我们相恋
这一季的秋天飘落后才发现
这幸福的碎片
要我怎么捡

2007-08-09T20:01:00.000-07:00

i watched SECRET - BU NENG SHUO DE MI MI yesterday !!

LOVES <3
and it was realli a nice show and i saw it at like near midnight .. gt more emotions hahas ! how dey met how dey fall in love how dey care for each other, how dey keep searching for each other - it was all wonderful !

de start it was quite funni and jay chou acted cute a few times LOL ! seldom tat he will do tat man but still nt bad la ..
but de last few part it was realli touching - how much dey feel for each other , de sacrifices dey willingly to make , tinking of each other no matter where dey were and also de sweet memories dey haf in de past - till de time when dey lost each other ~~
actually de part where dey fall in love was cute too ! de actions dey make and de kind of way dey reply hinting each other and nt realli showing it out hahas ! but de start may all jus be too gud ta be true !

but sad thing this song has no link ta de story LOL ! and de secret a bit weird arh ! BUT OVERALL DE LOVE STORY WAS GUD ..
and ty frenz who haf watch it with me !

bu guan shi jian duo chang neng zai yi qi jiu hao le arh ..

neng yu jian ni .. yi jing shi bu ke shi yi le

i'll find u no matter wat it takes ..

oh fcuk ! it jus making me EMO ! Zz any1 still want to watch can still ask me i don mind watching it again =))
no matter how long it is no matter how long de distance are ; having someone who yOou truly love to be in yOur arms is blessed ..

de hugs which comprises of love and misses .. de kisses which felt jus right ! everything would jus be perfect ! it would be great if all these were to come true in reality ..

2007-08-08T18:23:00.000-07:00

i wanna watch bu neng shou de mi mi !! ASAP
MY IDOL : JAY CHOU ! yey sing along with this song =))

u haf your way of handling me .. sometimes it may jus melt my heart but no worries LOL ! im jus scared tat i may fall _

and ger if u are reading this .. sry arh recently veri busi but after promos i will go find u de ! hahas ! MISS you too !
lot of emotions - but it jus seem hard to be written in words

sometimes its nt humji or wat ! tat is wat i call making a fool of urself .. y go do it if u noe wat will happen Zz ..
ya u all may well jus sae im a weakling fine den nth beta to sae but dere a limit to everything ..
among de fun and laughter - pls don forget how other will feel or act !

oh ya and jus went to see sth - quite compatible also arh ! LOL ! jus jk .. i tink photos are de best form of keeping as memories !
short sweet simple and it project de real yOou hahas ..

JIA YOU for masters in like 1 week later tats is fast man ! set aside all de differences first push hard for every training till den and we can concentrate on our promo le ! believe in urself believe in de TEAM ! all of us can do it kampatte

dere will never be a farewell as long as we stay close ta each other tc all =)) misses ~~

2007-08-05T03:00:00.000-07:00

NYDB 06-07 FAREWELL PARTY SIMPLY ROCK ! AND IT WAS WONDERFUL !

seniors , u all realli cann simply make de day for us ! de fun laughter and 'seriousness' ! playing with de captains ; contact rudby ! OMG tat was simply fun though i can get thrown off like easily but i don mind =x LOL ! throwing of ppl into de sea machiam throwing rubbish away ! LOL ! i tink i at least gt thrown 1o times but zh was worse hahas ! uncountable ! and we realli flew darn high man .. but it was definitely full of fun ! and all de scandals ! but derek and carol wohoo cool !

how great it would be if time simply stop at de moment and NYDB TEAM tgther having laughter and fun ! u all are realli a cute bunch of seniors man ! contact rugby team and throwing ppl team : black , yi yang , james lim , kai shuo , teng meng , koon loong , eric , hahas junior no need sae le hor ! den siao kia in water : elvis derek yi he zheng hui black and yi yang again sheldon and ME ! too many came in so cant sae all la =x but it was SUPER FUN !

seriously de guys seniors i tink i wont be able to forget BLACK ikhtia and yi yang ! dey are respected people and every word from dem matters .. dey are jus different from others and sth special from dem make de TEAM fun in de process of de 'sufferings' ! if u all would never leave de team ! i believe nyjc db will soar to greater heights !

and nydb seniors gals TEAM : ( nt in order of merit ) JEAN , BAO , SARAH CHUA , CHERYL KANG , YVONNE , CAROLNE , APPLE , CHERN HARN , KAILING , DINA , LIN HONG ( though never talk to her before but can see shes those siao siao and fun ppl =)) )
kinda tink of it ; i realli like gt talk to all seniors before hahas ! and most of dem nt jus plain talking !
YA and yvoone great person too ! de speech she delieve de motivation she give ; she also one of de special in de TEAM ! RESPECTABLE and simply possess wat it takes to be a leader ; i guess all de juniors love u too ! hahas !
KANG and CAROLINE i tink is de most siao in de TEAM ! and full of craps LOL but its definitely fun having u ppl around !

so many to sae and like wat yvonne sae ! all these experiences cant jus be shown in ur blog ! and ppl don sae me gay after i post this LOL !
BUT seriously its hard to part with u guys !
NYDB o6-o7

PS : ikhtia i noe i gt no artistic talent but feel in de blanks under our name and show us next time hahas ..

2007-08-03T18:22:00.000-07:00

this song bu neng shou de mi mi ! nice song ok ! by jay chou don sae its nt nice i kill u ! LOL ! enjoy =))

冷咖啡离开了杯垫
我忍住的情绪在很后面
拼命想挽回的从前
在我脸上依旧清晰可见
最美的不是下雨天
是曾与你躲过雨的屋檐
回忆的画面
在荡着秋千梦开始不甜
你说把爱渐渐放下会走更远
又何必去改变已错过的时间
你用你的指尖阻止我说再见
想象你在身边在完全失去之前
你说把爱渐渐放下会走更远
或许命运的签只让我们遇见
只让我们相恋这一季的秋天
飘落后才发现这幸福的碎片
要我怎么捡
冷咖啡离开了杯垫
我忍住的情绪在很后面
拼命想挽回的从前
在我脸上依旧清晰可见
最美的不是下雨天
是曾与你躲过雨的屋檐 Woo~
回忆的画面
在荡着秋千梦开始不甜
你说把爱渐渐放下会走更远
又何必去改变已错过的时间
你用你的指尖阻止我说再见
想象你在身边在完全失去之前
你说把爱渐渐放下会走更远
或许命运的签只让我们会遇见
只让我们相恋这一季的秋天飘落后才发现
这幸福的碎片
要我怎么捡

2007-08-03T17:44:00.000-07:00

hmm been realli busi these few days ! never come online leh i also dunno how i did it ! ok nvm so its has been a mugging session for me though its nt those intensive one ! LOL i jus cant concentrate well on studies la ! if i in de process disturb anyone sry hahas =x

and hooray ! todae is de farewell party for de seniors ! i tink a lot of dem haf been waiting for it ! but can i have a small request ! don tink bout studies jus for de day later and jus play hard ! LOL ! im sure it will be a fun day definitely ! take more photos again =))
but i felt realli sucky tat i didnt get any nice clothes ! hahas like some ppl sae i shall dress down todae ! clothing doesnt matter rite since appearance slightly dere ! opps ! lol i getting bhb again ..

and for ikhtia : hahas a lot of ppl asking y i admire u so much ! hmm take it this way ! like u can see he realli can study and play hard man ! this whole week i see him sure is mugging de LOL ! and u can see during db he darn serious also ! tat make a competent guy ok since most of us realli cant do tat well ! HAHAS and i experiece so much in life but hes someone tat realli deserve respect ! all de best for ur A lvl den !
de most impt thing de way he motivate ppl is definitely different from wat i experiencing nw ! though sometimes he gt a lot of crap la ! hahas ! ya and kt and i realli appreciate tat veri much ! ok i shall sae this openly and 1 most impt reason we staying nw is cuz of u ! we jus feel bad letting u down and also de TEAM of course ! we will KEEP HOLDING ON =)

ok before i sae anything more ! maybe some ppl realli tink i onli noe how to talk but do nth ! but wat i can sae is de talk is to help de TEAM and i haf prove everything on how much i push ! i tink this no one will prove me wrong rite ..
serious thing : guys team ya indeed we facing sort of a crisis nw ! though its nt obvious .. maybe cuz i hear too much .. but whether a nt dere bound to be problems ! ya ok GUYS tink bout this after MASTER series we can focus totally in studies ! 1 whole month ok ! don tell me its nt enough ! so from nw till den push all we can jus for master ! our GOAL top 1o remember ! set aside all de differences ! put away all de passion or commitment thingy ! JUS for this short period of time 2 weeks ? push all for MASTER whether u are happi a nt ! FOR DE TEAM OK don tink of jus de individuals ! PROVE dem wrong show tat we can ! ALL DE BEST ok ! work hard TEAM !

HAPPI BIRTHDAY TO GER TOO =))

2007-07-30T05:49:00.000-07:00

yey ! came to see my blog and jus wanna post sth ! hahas !
yey few days back gt sth scary happen man ! like a natural disaster ; worse then a terrorist attack : quote from lcm LOL !
de freaking strong wind blew de jellyfish use for ndp out of its place man ! and it carried with it fence ok ! it was scary Zz and i can see a few army bag attached to it also ! hahas and it flew all de way up to nicoll highway man ! hur hur ~ ! i shall show some of de photos some day later !
till den i gt lot of work to do ! MUGGER WOHOO !

i yearn for de touch tat was long gone ..
will u be dere ?
senseless ! LOST ! is wat i want wat u want ?
MISSES

2007-07-28T01:17:00.000-07:00

KEEP HOLDING ON ! ty for de advice hahas !

todae back to rowing ! seriously i realli enjoy rowing though i may nt row tat well ! hmm and yesterday haf de meet de parent session !
ok my result realli sux to de core ! dere nth i can console myself of or lie to myself ! i jus gotta face it !
and wat i can do is to mug from nw on ! 2 more months ! goona give in all i can ! so i tink i wont be blogging so often since like so few ppl come liao also ! nth much to sae also ! and if im slacking at my studies pls remind me to work hard ! haish !
high retain rate but i goona pia to pass my promos and also try to do well !

ya its true i haf to face it ! i haf to be realistic i cant be tat optimistic anymore ! wat if i realli haf no choice but to quit ! i dunno ! seriously blurred ! ty for all those who encourage me all this while ! i appreciate it very much seriously ! but one day if i fall i doubt i can climb up myself again ! its realli hard to make our own decision ! many of us are facing this prob ! i also dunno how ! wat if all of us haf to go ! i realli dunno ! please let de passion i used to haf to get me through this phase ! ONCE A teammate ALWAYS a TEAM ~!

i miss yOou ! miss yOou darn dearly ! it melts in my heart

2007-07-26T08:50:00.000-07:00

get it clear - i don like to be CONTROLLED !
please don leave me till im on de verge of everything left hanging dere ! with jus 2 option left !
i simply hate it ! i wanna stay as it is nw ! but im losing de thing im holding on in de past ! WHY ? i don wanna be force with jus 1 option left and i hope u guys dont too ! haish ! it is dying ! TRIED to revive it back but it seem so impossible !
so many things are jus pushing me to de other side ! how ? im jus afraid ~

i need freedom ! losing hope passion ! argh ! PLEASE DON LEFT ME WITH NO CHOICE ! im trying my best but i feel tat i cant hold on for long unless its revive !

2007-07-25T07:19:00.000-07:00

y mus dere be ppl interfering in our life ! y cant we live de way we want ! maybe its true tat i yearn for too much freedom !
but is tat wrong ? todae haf a wat skid on sex thingy but nt much of those but more on bgr .. its jus remind me of all those naggy days ur parents noe when u start dating ! and dey will like hint u eh boy don do tat hor ! LOL u always noe wat dey mean la ! YA so wat i can onli sae hmm be responsible for ur own actions ba ! hahas ! indulge in de happiness but also tink of de consequences ! LOL y am i saying this ok nvm !

but tinking back, it actually feels gud being in love ! provided de love is genuine ! ya true love seem nearly impossible but it definitely feels lovely and heartwarming though its more difficult to reach for ! but no point holding on to one tat u haf to struggle so hard to carry on !
wat for dating tgther if u find faults in tat person and haf to tolerate with it ! hmm should jus appreciate or like wat de other party haf ba !
when faults arises it will jus led to a breakup ! and ya ppl do hate it ! especially gals LOL and i realli believe tat gals do treasure relationship more den guys ! opps ! ok im nt siding with myself hahas

ok too EMO recently in de end saying all these things ! ok nt goona sae anymore !

because of yOou - it brightens up my life every single bit
<3

2007-07-24T05:34:00.000-07:00

seriously EMO-ing nw ! dere nth for anyone to read ! jus ranting
we jus simply need to face de realistic world out dere ! its impossible to reverse anything or even change a single bit of it ! its jus tat cruel !
ure weak ure out ! tat simple ! wats all tat about modern or wat crap shit ! its useless ! even de freedom of speech its impossble for us this secular state to promote anything more ! u jus haf to abide by de rules ! nth can be change !
from young u jus gotta study ! mug mug mug ! life seem meaningless but u jus noe u haf to do it ! and all those sterostypes ! i simply hate it !
vulgarities den ppl condemn u ? ok maybe tats de reality ! but i don wish my life to be controlled of ! so wat if ppl condemn me i don give a dam !
maybe this lost of freedom made ppl do so many wrong things ? y cant ppl look at things in a more flexible way and tink in a different manner ! NO no one simply can ! wth is this ! am i living in a controlled world ! i wish to get out of it ! its unbearable !

de higher u go de more restrictions u haf ! impossible to live in a world of ur own ! harsh cruel reality ! i hate it !
ya ppl condemn u ! and once u lose hope in life u tend to sink in further ! all de way till u became useless ! im sure im right ! i seen too much of life around !
it works this way ! i been to de good and bad ! no matter where u are, dere things u jus gotta face !
i jus hope dere will be a saviour who will jus get everyone out of this ! ya as we grow older we want more freedom ! but tink about it ! de more freedom we haf more ppl are jus watching us ! last time u get into fights who give a dam ! de most u jus get scolding or de most slight caning ! nw ppl will jus tarnish u like crazy and u receive even harsher punishment ! so wat for ! grow older = more restrictions ! argh ! F UP world !

if dere a essay do u agree tat as u grow older more things are just restricted and nt within your control ! i tink i will score darn well man ! and my english seem to improve ! LOL !

status : emo-ing and reflecting ! JUS HOPE TAT life would be easier to handle !

2007-07-23T05:25:00.000-07:00

suddenly dere so much restrictions ! i felt out of breath ! suddenly cant tink of anything properly nw !
i thought everything would be easi ! but its jus nt true ! nw gotta cope with lot of things as a JC student ! studies db teachers and friends !
things are certainly nt going my way ! ARGH ! i tink i need someone to be dere for me again =/

todae haf a study talk ! requirements : pass 2 h2 and 1 h1 or no water rowing session ! i tink its jus darn hard for me ! am i able to do it ? im nt sure ! my mind in a fluster ! seriously i feel lost ! like wat some sae : wats a dragonboater without rowing with his paddle ! haish ! back to de realistic life , studies is still de most impt for me now =((

db ! ok i noe my rowing sux nw ! i also dunno wat happen ! jus don feel well ! and plus de stress mounting ! i feel tat its hard for me to take it ! but im goona try my best ! no matter how much more it may take me i willingly to do so ! i wanna row beta but everytime im jus so far away ! CMON i believe next rowing session would be beta and i goona prove myself tat !

neglecting my loved ones friends so many ! my life simply seem out of hand ! am i able to regain back my confidence and to excel both in my studies and db ! i hope tat i can but i noe its hard ! no more de cheerful me ; i feel lost !
smiles on me is gone !
i don want to quit db seriously over my dead bodies ! i hope no one force me to ! HAISH ! but my rowing and studies sux ! will i jus be ask to leave ! i don want ! argh ! i don wanna tink anymore ! i noe i jus gotta hang in dere !

2007-07-22T05:21:00.000-07:00

1 word - DEMORALIZED

EMO-ING myself nw ! lucky dere were u guys cheering me up jus nw ! hmm all de jokes it realli brighten up my day ! ty !
i noe i never be able to be on par with u guys ! all de chances gone ! no matter hw much i put in ! its still nt enough

没想过爱竟会下落不明
寂寞都不忍心
故事的结局走不出背影
我只能静静地
风吹醒那些曾经
转过身我用眼泪聆听
心该怎么学会去适应
那些没你的安静
我也想小心地收起所有回忆
却总是忍不住不断的翻起
没想过爱竟会下落不明
寂寞都不忍心
故事的结局走不出背影
我只能 (我只能) 静静地
风吹醒那些曾经 (那些曾经)
转过身我用眼泪聆听
心该怎么学会去适应
那些没你的安静
我也想小心地收起所有回忆
你却一直住在心里
是谁都无法代替
Ho-Oh~ Woo-OhDa-Da-Da-Da-Da Da-DaWoo-Oh-Ho~

2007-07-21T07:59:00.000-07:00

i luv milo peng ! mi lu bing ! wohoo ! nice song man ! de guys are cute too =)) especially sam and nick! dey simply rox man and i goona get their disc soon ! enjoy !
深夜里
无法习惯没有你
不愿意再走下去
这距离痛得我不能呼吸
难忘记你的失去
多少眼泪都无所谓我闭上眼睛不能入睡
只希望你给我一些安慰
这些眼泪我无所谓真心的对待最珍贵
我回头想起爱情的甜美永远不后悔
深夜里
无法习惯没有你
不愿意再走下去
这距离痛得我不能呼吸
难忘记你的失去
多少眼泪都无所谓我闭上眼睛不能入睡
只希望你给我一些安慰
这些眼泪我无所谓真心的对待最珍贵
我回头想起爱情的甜美永远不后悔
牵领我进入睡梦追随重温过去
我们两梦中相依偎虽是梦幻愿沉醉
多少眼泪都无所谓我闭上眼睛不能入睡
只希望你给我一些安慰
这些眼泪我无所谓真心的对待最珍贵
我回头想起爱情的甜美永远不后悔

this song 泪i tink is quite nice la ! but in de web dont sound tat nice cannot hear their nice bass or wat ! and de song is cut grr ! nvm jus listen ba or i maybe i try find beta de ! its nice aniwae ! i goona change to another song by sam de soon ! tat one is nice also !
so enjoy !

hmm todae dunno y my phone suddenly off den i switch it on again ! my phone gt de phone lock la den its being so long since i last off my phone LOL ! den i kinda forget my pass gRr ! but luckily i still remember yOou ! hahas ! i dont noe if u noe who u are a nt LOL ! i tink i still do miss u though its like darn long le ! but onli simply misses ba hahs

so todae went hl house watch SHUTTER tgther ! lol ok even though its been so long since we last watch it in theatre but its still scary la ! i tink tat its de best horror movie ever man ! its great ! though some of u shouted like siao kia ! and after tat *ahem ahem* i shant sae wat we see hahs ..

gud luck to all those running for mizuno wave run 2morrow ! all de best ! yey beat de others ! and hope for a beta sea training 2morrow !
and yes i did study a bit todae ! beta den nth ! LOL ! =)) CMON As .. hahas ! though its still darn far ! i will be a mugger ok ! don look down on me wahahas ! tC all x))

2007-07-20T07:13:00.000-07:00

todae was realli a fun and lovely day =)) except for de tiring lessons !
its still u guys who can really cheer me up ! its impossible for me to stay EMO when im with u guys hahas ! especially with all de jokers around !
gym indeed become a second home for us x)) been trying to correct my strokes hope i get over de phobia since de day i drop my paddle =/
and mr lee try sth on me todae tying both hands lock ! ya indeed it will help cuz we realli nid ta stretch forward and bend in order to row more fluidly ! he ask if it benefit if everyone use this method on boat LOL ! but it somehow will feel like blood stop circulating and strain ur muscle like siao hahas ! BUT to achieve our aim everything is worth it !

i want to be more flexible ! grr i can feel my hand darn stiff but i jus cant change man ! sian !
and bao oh hor scandal with zh hor ! LOL now everyone noe liao after i publicise it ! wohoo =)) msg him ! hahas ! and tat elvis presley thing omg realli fucking funni ! i tink nw also darn funni man ! cant stop laughing ! hmm mon no fartlek but study talk ! die liao la me ! tink de most U belong to me cuz other ppl gp win me liao =/ DEAD !

jus one more glance is enough !
stop peeping at me cuz i wont noe wat to do !
give me a hint and i will noe =))

2007-07-19T07:08:00.000-07:00

ok feeling much beta todae =))
so im nt goona be so bad anymore ! but rather EMO-ing ! ok been tinking bout ques ask by others ! which one do u fear more ?
1) failing in all ur subjects and may even retain
2) kena kicked out by db !
for me its sure is option 2 though im nt sure of de main reason yet ! and de ans for me its darn obvious ! is it for u ? im nt saying studies are nt impt but are u pushing enough for db ? hope all of u do !
nth much to sae aniwae ! well done in gym training ! can see everyone pushing real hard and i feel stronger ! wohoo !
yeah and ty tat u wont ask me to quit db to my parents ! this is wat u sae ! don break ur promise ! ya ur rite db is everything to me ! i haf passion for it and also for de teammates ! and i doing all this nt for exco seat or wat pls ! and this is de first time sae tat to me ! so u can see my reaction was like definitely NO ! its for de TEAM !
yeah ok tats all i goona change to a EMO song lol ! its quite nice though de lyrics dont suit me now =)) luckily hahas

DON read it unless u wanna be fcuked

2007-07-18T07:07:00.000-07:00

Nabei fcuking pissed nw ! de following things i going to sae sure isnt pleasant and i don give a dam ok !
ya true im full of vulagarities ! cant stand argh FCUK off lo ! no one tell me wat to do ! ya im like this don like it also nt my tai ji rite !
and knn ! todae morning wa lan aye ccb u dare suan me like this ! i didnt noe how i tolerate with it and even give u a smile back ! WTF la ! de more i tink i realli want give u a bash right in de face man ! even if im kana kick out of sch i don give a dam ! ya i nearly fought with teacher before and even dey cant tolerate me ! ya so wat u want to do ?

u tink im scared cuz i like fail all my subjects ! eh pls this is my life ok ! dun go one round and come fcuking suan me ! so wat if it realli bad ! and u still dare ask me if im angry ! and i actually said NO wtf am i tinking man ! i hate ppl talking to me in this manner and i seriously will nt give u any respect anymore ! so wat if u are a teacher ! i seriously don give a fcuking dam ! and i don tink ur suan is funni or wat ! it jus turn ppl off and made me feel darn pissed !

and sure go complain to my parents all u want ! ya sae wat fcuking bad results i haf wat fcuking attitude i give ok ! i don give a dam bout tat ! and u bloody hell beta nt suggest me to quit db ! u do tat i realli dunno wat i will do right in front of u ! don fcuking test me ! i can turn darn nasty if u want me ! i will show u no mercy ! don try me ! lim bei siao aye u better hurry off run man ! CCB !

ok next thing ! im nt trying to mean anything or wat ! ya ok i noe u all sure haf fun with me this few months ! ya indeed ui haf change ! but sometimes dere is a limit for everyone ! i can joke most of de time but when im nt feeling gud beta don agitate me ! even u are my frenz or wat i wont give a dam at de point of time ! tats y i did so many wrong things ! i noe its fun suaning me or wat ! tat is fine i mean ya its a team and frenz wat den don want make it so serious ! but dere a limit to everything ! i realli don wanna show de other side of me don force me ! i beginning to feel i cant control anymore ! i still can joke but don push de limit ! i believe dere no way i can change from my old self ! my temper is realli getting worse ! stress is mounting ! FCUK !

darn tired time to sleep ~ !